Good Girl | | Michael Clifford

2.0

Michael|

Joey never failed to amaze me. She's incredibly talented and it kills me that she thinks otherwise. Every single one of us in the room thought she did amazing! Yet she still puts herself down. She never said it but you could tell by her response and through her actions.

When she left the room, I decided to go check to make sure she was ok. Once I saw she was, I didn't bring the fact that I was worrying about her up. We just messed around.

I felt happier being with her than I have any one else. I've only been in one serious relationship that I regret so badly. I know everyone thinks of my past when it comes to relationships with me. No one thinks about what I'm doing now or could do in the future. They think I'll always have one night stands and not care about one person.

But they're wrong.

I haven't even thought about being with another girl since the day Jo came home with us. And I liked that.

I honestly really liked having only her on my mind. But no one will see that. They won't even think that me settling down could happen. And it hurts.

I wish they would see the positive things instead of the negative ones but it's society. No one thinks or sees things the way they should.

"Hey," Joey says softly from beside me, breaking me from my thoughts.

She was back in the chair beside me. We were all finished writing after a long 6 hours. It was almost 7 and I was a bit exhausted.

Everyone was in a conversation so it felt like it was just me and her. Especially when I looked into her eyes. I got this warm, fuzzy feeling in my tummy when I saw the worry and caring look in her eyes. It looked like she was caring. She most likely was, knowing her.

"Yeah?" I whispered, looking down at her.

"Are you okay?"

I looked at her confused, "What do you mean?"

"Well, you've been spaced out for the past 10 minutes for one. You're also bouncing your knee extremely fast which is something you do when you're either worried or nervous. And lastly, you had a look of pain and sadness on your face. As if what you're thinking about is causing you to be sad. You're thinking about negative things aren't you?"

I was surprised. I was surprised that she noticed why my knee bounces. I was surprised that she could read me that easily. I was surprised that she looked like she honestly cared.

"You wanna go to the deck?" I ask her, wanting to tell her when we're alone.

She nodded. We got up silently and went to the deck on the upper floor, the one from the living room that over looks the city. It was starting to get dark so the view was much more beautiful. Especially when I turned to my left to see something even more beautiful.

I wanted to tell her this so she knows how I feel about her. I want her to know that she's the only one. I want her to know that she's the only one I ever think about. I want to know if she really cares.

"So are you gonna tell me what's got you sad?" She spoke softly. She reached for my hand and held it while our elbows sat on the railing.

I hesitated, not exactly knowing what to say.

"When you said you would give us a chance, was my past the main thing clouding your mind at that moment?"

I wasn't even looking at her when I said this. I just looked straight ahead.

I felt her turn towards me. I then felt her small hands grasp my face and turn it towards her.

"Michael, I don't care about your past because that's what it is, your past. It didn't cross my mind at all when you asked me that last night. When you said you stopped thinking and doing what you had done the day I came home with y'all, I saw the truth. I trusted you. I trusted that you wouldn't go back for that. You're doing it for both me and you and for your present and future. What happened in the past was the past. It was a rough time for you and no one gets that. I can tell that those thoughts are what people think of you first. They don't even give your present or future a chance. But I have. I trust you and I care." My eyes were watery by time she finished. I looked down as a single tear fell.