𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐒 • Tom Kaulitz

chapter thirty-one

Skin to skin contact was a huge thing for Crimson. It made her feel safe when she lay in bed with Tom, both of them shirtless, her hand exploring his bare torso. Ben, Felix, and the few other guys Crimson had been with back in England all made her feel that they only wanted her body sexually. For her, it wasn't always about lust, but about vulnerability.

"I'm kinda hungry," Crimson whispered. She was surprised when Tom turned to her, able to hear her over the TV.

"Why don't we go to the gas station and get some snacks?" He suggested. Crimson smiled, silently agreeing as she stood up and pulled her shirt, jacket and shoes on. Tom did the same, and the two left for the gas station.

They decided to drive to one pretty far from Tom's house, about a twenty minute drive, because it had the best snacks. The closer ones were all basic. They got out of the car and headed inside, the only person in there being the tired looking cashier.

Crimson grabbed the snacks she wanted, Tom coming up behind her. She smiled, biting down on her lip. She loved how tall he was. Even though she was average height, he still towered over her.

"You done?" He asked. She nodded. "Pass those to me and go and get in the car."

"Let me pay," Crimson said, "It's my stuff."

Tom smiled, taking the food out of Crimson's hand and leaning down to kiss her cheek. "Don't care. Now get in the car."

She playfully rolled her eyes and headed out to the car. The gas station was dark, dimly lit by the lights above the pumps. A car unexpectedly pulled up, a dark figure stepping out to pump some gas. He was wearing a hoodie, but the hood was down, and Crimson instantly knew who it was. Ben.

"Shit," she whispered to herself. He knew the car was there. He'd seen Tom's car before, and right now all Crimson could do was pray he didn't remember what it looked like. She pulled her hood up and looked down, her heart beating rapidly. She couldn't help but look up every now and then at what he was doing. He didn't look at the car, not once. He pulled up his hood and faced the ground as he walked into the gas station, right past Tom. They didn't seem to notice each other at all.

When Tom got in the car, Crimson was in a very clear state of panic. "What's up?" He asked, "Red?"

"Drive."

Tom didn't hesitate on driving fast, making it home much quicker than they'd got there. When they pulled into his driveway, he walked around the car and helped Crimson out, wrapping an arm around her as he guided her up to his room. Once he'd sat her down on the bed and got her shoes and jacket off for her, he finally asked again.

"What's wrong?"

"Ben," Crimson breathed out, "He was there, pumping gas."

"Are you sure it was him?"

"Yes I'm sure, Tom, he doesn't exactly have a forgettable face!" Tom was taken aback by Crimson's sudden yelling, but he knew she didn't mean to. He knew she was just worried, scared. Who wouldn't be? He brought her close to him, holding her head against his chest.

"He didn't see you, okay? It's been months. It's fine. I wouldn't let him hurt you. I wouldn't let anyone hurt you."

Crimson smiled, looking back up at him. She'd always thought he was so pretty, especially his eyes. She'd been staring at him for quite some time when he began to laugh.

"What?" She asked.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Tom smiled.

"Like what?"

"Like you're scared to kiss me."

"I'm not scared to kiss you. I'm scared to lose you."

Tom smiled sadly. "You never will."