Chapter 19

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"Bloody hell," Ben muttered as he dragged a hand down his face. He must have been tutoring Lauren for an hour and a half now. He couldn't explain things easier to a Kindergartner! Yet, here she is, on the brink of tears, saying she doesn't get it.

He's been trying to be so patient with her, but it's running dry. He's feeling himself turn back into his colder self, before changing for the sake of his relationship.

"Okay," he said a little louder than he intended, "here's what I don't understand, Lauren, is why on earth you have got the grades you've gotten for the past several years, yet when it comes to this class and this class only, you cannot figure out simple structuring."

Lauren seemed shocked, scared and caught. "You looked at my other grades?" She sheepishly asked.

"Of course I did," he told her. She had a glimmer of hope in her eyes until he said, "I wanted to see if you being in my class was a mistake!" She put her head down. "Lauren, why are you wasting, not only my time, but your's?"

She sighed and shook her head. "I'm sorry. It's...it's really stupid."

"I'm sure it is, but I would like to hear it anyways."

She let out a deep, deep breath. "Well...I just...I don't know, I think you're really cool." Ben waited for something else, but it didn't come.

"That's it? Well, that is really stupid."

She quickly corrected, "I mean, like...really cool, Mr. Cumberbatch. I don't know, I kind of think we have a lot in common and I guess I wanted to get to know you more."

Well, he was right. So was Cassie, Sam and even Tom. This girl has a crush on him. He did speak to Cassie about if it ever got to this point. She told him how to handle it and he had to remember one very vital thing.

Keep calm.

He sighed. "Lauren, look..." He let out another sigh. "I am not interested in you that way. I am sorry, but it won't happen. I understand the school's policy about relationships between professor's and students, but that will not happen here."

Instead of almost crying, she was crying. "But why not? Am I not pretty enough?"

Ben groaned and practically slammed his head down onto his desk. "No...I mean, no, but...fucking hell, it just isn't going to happen. I'm sorry if I gave any indication that it might, but it won't."

At this point, she started huffing through her tears like she was angry. "So, what, you'll fuck other girls, but not me?"

Ben was startled and very confused. "I'm sorry? Who told you this? I assure you, I have not slept with any students, no matter what you've might have heard."

"I was told you slept with that Moretti girl! And one named Katie and Mads and..."

Ben waved his hands around as he said, "Woah, woah, woah let me stop you right there! I never slept with Katie, nor Mads. I'm not sure how you heard this or even know them, but if you did you would know that never happened. When it comes to 'the Moretti girl', her and I were already in a relationship before I started here. She just so happened to be in my class after that. It was not intentional. Christ, I don't know why I'm explaining this to a...!" He stopped himself in fear of saying something he'll get in trouble for.

However, it was too late. "A what, Mr. Cumberbatch!?" She demanded to know.

He couldn't help himself any longer. "A child! Because that it what you are! You're nineteen for Christ's sakes! Go to frat parties and drink with the boys your age! I am too old and too taken for you to even attempt this! Get out! Now!"

She aggressively picked up her things and started to walk out. Before she slammed the door, he called, "I will be reporting this to The Dean and you will be out of my class!"

Cassie's jaw was to the floor after hearing all of this. Ben was fuming and pacing the living room as he told it and continued to after he was done. "You reported her, right?" She asked.

"Of bloody course I did!"

"Okay, don't yell I'm just making sure in case this girl decides to do something stupid! How in the hell would she know Mads or Katie's names? How would she know mine?"

Annoyed, Ben said, "Don't flatter yourself, you were referred to as the Moretti girl."

She scoffed. "And don't go getting on a high horse because some nineteen year old wants to fuck you! I'm only asking questions!"

"Which I don't have the answers to and you damn well know it!"

With that, Cassie put up her hands in surrender and walked out of the room. It's the best thing she learnt how to do when he got like this. It's a way of letting him know that she was over the conversation and that he fucked up.

Seeing this, he sighed heavily. "Fuck."

He found her upstairs measuring what was going to be the nursery. He leaned against the door and watched her measure where she wanted the crib to be. After they lost the baby, Ben donated everything he had gotten for this room.

"I'm sure I can find that same crib again," he told her. "I know you liked it." She ignored him and kept measuring. "Cass, I'm sorry, alright? I lost my cool and I shouldn't have taken it out on you." She halted what she was doing. Even she had to admit his apologies were getting better, especially when he acknowledges what he's done now.

He saw her halting as his cue to go the rest of the way into the room. When he reached her, he put his hand along her slowly growing belly and gently pulled her back to his chest. He pressed a kiss to her neck as he said, "I love you and I'm sorry. I'm so stressed out about all this."

He buried his face in her neck. "I'm sure all this baby stuff isn't helping either," she told him rather insecurely. He lifted his head and put his chin on her shoulder.

"No. No, actually, it's been helping. Thinking about it, I mean. It's the one thing I'm really looking forward to."

"You...really mean that?"

He smirked. "There are only two things that you will never have to ask me assurance of. That's if I love you and if I am finally excited to be a father."

She finally turned in his arms and hugged him. He hugged her close and rubbed at her back. "I'm sorry you're so stressed," she told him.

He chuckled and held her tighter. "I know, Sweetheart. I know you only try to help and I need to see that more." He could feel her smile into his chest. "See? I've worked on myself a bit."

She laughed through some tears. "Yes you have. You're amazing."

"Not as amazing as you." He pressed a kiss to her head and kept hugging her. 

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