Chapter [28]

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The songs for this chapter are:

-Skyscraper: Demi Lovato

-You & I: One Direction

-As Long As You Love Me: Justin Bieber

-Nothing Would Be Better: Nick Jonas

Justin's POV

I can feel my heart.

I can feel it breaking.

I can feel it pounding.

I can feel it shattering.

I can feel it, in my chest, tightening the chambers as if to build the walls higher. But what's the use when she knocks them down?

But doesn't she see how badly she can hurt me?

Doesn't she see how much I need her to save me?

Why did Selena keep that from me, and why does it hurt so bad?

I don't give a shit about Nathan, he can jump off a fucking bridge for all I care, and it doesn't bother me that my father was paying him even though that's fucked up. The hate and anger and hurt is all because of Selena.

You're pathetic, Justin. Just listen to yourself. She can't keep secrets, but when you do, you expect her to take it lightly and continue on as if nothing happened. How very egotistical of you, Bieber.

I shake my head frantically to try and rid the second voice in my mind. My conscious screams at me, but my Devils take the wheel this time.

How very stupid of me.

I don't fight it.

My knuckles turn white as they clench at my sides. The ground beneath me shakes and roars with every step I take further into this damn vacant field.

I glance over my shoulder to make sure no one is watching me, back at the parking lot where my fathers' car is parked. Why can't I just get into a wreck with that car too?

Fuck this shit.

The air around me absorbs some what of the steam rolling off of me as I continue on along in the field behind Subway. With every step I take I hear her voice, I see her smile, I feel her warm breathe fanning out over my cheeks.

She's not here.

Oh, but she is.

How is it possible to love someone so much? How can someone, alone, drive you insane but you wouldn't have it any other way?

Never looking back, I finally decide I am right where I need to be and sit down bringing my knee's up and resting my arms on them. My head falls on top of my hands, as I stare into nothing.

The ground is cold and lifeless, much like how I used to be and whom I used to surround myself with. Until her light brightened up my soul.

I don't love her for the little things she does, but for everything.

And yet, perhaps I may never understand her truly, I mean she's a woman, and they are complex as fuck; but I can try. That counts for something right?

I sit here feeling sorry for myself, because Selena kept a small secret from me.

A small pathetic smile slithers over my lips as I close my eyes to tilt my head back. Inhaling the crisp air with a deep breathe, until I let myself go, slipping briskly backwards to land in the grass with a barely noticeable thud.

"You know what Justin?" Selena's fingers line my chest and they spiral their way down my stomach, "I love stars."

"How come?" It seems like such a silly question to be asking, but I find myself interested to know why.

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