Society (Phan)

Chapter Six

It has been a week since the awkward encounter with Phil and is once again Monday, everyone's least favourite day, for many reasons. The main reason constitutes of the fact of returning back to school or work after a weekend of no rules and freedom.

I have the first lesson with Phil - Art.

Since English last week, I've had to sit next to Phil three times, and thankfully we're once again talking. Not coherently, but enough. Small conversations can be my forte, so thankfully, this didn't affect me as it probably would to others.

The 'short conversations' mainly consists of 'shut up' or at most, 'hi, how are you'. But beggars can't be choosers and I am happy with that amount of dialogue.

As Phil and I went through those few lessons of not speaking, minimal work has been done. We currently hold the place of being the most behind and the least unorganised on the project. Even Alfie and Marcus, which may I add has basically copied most of the people here, stealing their ideas without crediting, have began their work.

I have noticed in these lessons of doing nothing substantial that the type of music reflects on someone's emotions or past experiences. An example of this stereotypically being the heavier the music, the more depressed person. Another stereotype I have encountered with is being the jocks listening to music which mainly consists of six or seven words on a repetitive cycle and no real meaning.

The thing I love the most about music is how differently people understand and relate to lyrics. To one, a sentence out of a song maybe the most relatable thing ever, but to others it maybe some incoherent shit with no real purpose or meaning.

Music is like a person. It can be someone's best friend to extent of the feeling of being spoken to by the artist. Understanding them as if they were a teacher of their easiest subject or being in the complete opposite and like being in a Maths lesson in some peoples perspective.

I get to school once again slightly too early so I go and sit in my form room and at least try to rest. There is no doubt in saying that school is stress on a daily basis, and the older you get, the tougher life seems.

I put in my ear phones and aimlessly listen to whatever song comes up, seeing if there are any lyrics that are relatable at this current point in time. I listen for about ten minutes before a song I hadn't really heard much before came on, but I left it on as it was tranquil and easy to listen to.

The feeling if finding new relatable lyrics is like finding 'the one', it's a good feeling and the only way I can describe it.

'I was told when I get older all my fears would shrink but now I'm insecure and I care what people think'.

This is so true, when you're five, you have no burdens and life is easy. You don't care about your appearance or whom to impress. You don't have to hide behind bullshit just to fit in, it's hard to be a loner, a nerd, and outcast. But when you reach early adolescence, everything is difficult. You have to look good and be in the right hierarchy to be liked.

For a Monday morning, my overly enthusiastic form tutor is just too much. The bloody care free walk he does when he waltz into the class is just too much to comprehend.

I take out my earphones and switch off my phone. My other class mates discuss what activities they've done over the weekend with their many friends whilst Phil, who has just walked in, and I sit in mere silence.

The registration is done and we both head to Art but across the paths from each other, keeping as much unnecessary distance.

We reach the lesson and surprisingly, for once, no one is late so we get straight on with the work. As Phil and I are the most behind and unorganised, we will probably have to work for extra times together out of school, which means going to one another's house.