After our walk back to the school, everyone is still leaving prom. Including the people we came with.
"Where have you guys been?" Ashton asks with a smirk on his face.
"No." I say glaring at him. "We were talking." I say and Luke nods his head.
"I told her mates." Luke says and everyone nods their heads. I look over at Rachel and she has the same look on her face that I did when I found out. I walk over and hug her.
"I know Rach. We'll make it through." I whisper in her ear as she sniffles.
"Okay." She says as we pull apart.
"Let's get going." Calum says and we slide into the limo.
We all drive in silence. I think all of us are sinking in to what's going to happen in just 3 weeks. We're enjoying the last days of us seeing each other face to face. Being able to touch them, hug them, kiss them.
"How long is the tour?" I ask. I know I'm going to regret asking this question but I have to know.
"6 months." Ashton says and it feels like I just got uppercut me in the stomach.
"Okay." I say and I look over at Rachel, who's cuddled up to Michael. One of the last times we'll be able to do that.
"We don't want to go either. Well we do, it's just we'll miss you guys a lot." Calum says and I give him a weak smile.
"Maybe you could come on tour with us!" Ashton says and Rachel yells in excitement, while I just sink down into my seat even farther. "What do you say Rena? Rachel's already in board." Ashton asks smiling at me.
"I, I can't." I say and everyone looks at me.
"Why?" Luke asks. I can tell he's confused.
"What about college? What about my future? You guys are planning as if I know I'm apart of y'all's future. As if I'm important enough to be apart of your rock star life ahead of you. I have a future too guys. And I'm not going to throw it away for a guy that I'm pretty sure doesn't love me back, or would cheat on me while he's on the road!" I say as the car pulls up to my house. Everyone is taken back by my words, and Luke is on the verge of tears. Before anyone could say anything I get out of the limo and walk to my house. Michael is the only one who gets out of the car, but that's only because we're neighbors. I look back one last time, and see piercing blue eyes looking at me. I can't make out the expression on his face. I think it's a mixture of hurt and understanding. I look away and get the key from underneath my door mat, and unlock the door and walk in not looking back again.
And there I sit in my bed at 5 in the morning, crying my eyes out. Some prom huh? Does Luke even love me? Does he really care? Will he keep his promise? Why are so many thoughts rushing in my head all at once. I can't process all of them, and it's making my head spin.
Why does he make me feel this way? So helpless, so sad, so broken? And how is it that he makes me feel complete, happy, and alive? Why must I be in love with someone who I don't know if they truly love me back? He inspires me so much, and I can't tell if that's good or bad. I love you Luke Robert Hemmings. Fucking love me back.
I wake up the next morning journal in my hands, mascara on my cheeks, and red eyes.
"Hey honey, are you alright?" My mom asks as she walks into my room with pancakes in her hand.
"Yeah, just really confused and sad right now." I say sighing and sitting up.
"Awe honey I'm sorry. Do you want to talk about it?" She asks as she sits down on the foot of my bed.
"Sure," I say sighing again. "I won prom queen last night,"
"Oh my god that's amazing!" My mom chirps. I just give her a weak smile and she calms down.
"And Luke got prom king. And while we were dancing he confessed his real feelings for me. He loves me back. He broke up with his girlfriend and everything. Me and him went somewhere quiet, and no we didn't have sex. We went somewhere quiet to go talk, that's it. Anyways he told me that he was going on tour and the tour lasts 6 months. Of course I'm sad, he finally expresses how he feels for me, and in 3 weeks he's leaving. I'm scared he's going to cheat on me, or move on. Then they invited me and Rachel to go on tour with them. And I blew up, I declined the invitation and just blew up. I'm just so confused and I don't know what to do mom." I say as I fall onto her chest, and start to sob.
"Oh honey, I'm sorry. But it will be okay. I promise. If he loves you, he won't move on, and he'll wait for you. But keep it in mind that 6 months is a long time to be away from someone. I can't control how he acts, and you can't either. If he moves on, you have to move on too. Love is a mysterious thing. We chase it all out life, and once we have it we let it go. We try to hard to get it, but make such little effort to keep it. Love does crazy things to people, and sometimes you just have to let it go." She says as she rubs my back.
"Thanks mom." I say as I wipe my face. What she said helps. But it also makes me even for confused. Do I love him, or let him go?
YOU ARE READING
Football Buddies
FanfictionRena's high school has a system. The system is called the "Buddy System". Yes it's been used since you were in elementary school, but Rena's high school was different. Each girl was assigned to a football player. No one had any say in it, or can swi...
