Regret

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-Phil's POV-

We laid back on his bed, shirtless and sweating. My fringe was sticking to my forehead and my jeans were uncomfortably hot and tight. We were both panting and exhausted. Literally the best work out I've had in years.
We both shoot up when we hear a lock click and the door open.
"Dammit."

"Dan?" I must've looked horrified because he just laughed at me "What the hell am I supposed to do? Do you want me to hide?"

"Dude calm down. My mom is chill. I guess she was gonna find out sooner or later."

"Okay but I don't want to meet her like this!"

"If you wanna hide in my closet, knock yourself out."

"I might actually take you up on that." I roll my eyes at him.
Seriously though, what's his mom gonna think when the first time she meets her sons boyfriend is a when he's shirtless and sweating because he's just been grinding on her son. If I was a mother, that would not be a good first impression on me.
I might actually be having a panic attack.
"Dan, are you home?" I hear footsteps coming through the kitchen and towards the door.
God, no.
"Yeah, Phil is here too."
At this point I didn't even care if she knew what I just did with Dan, or she saw my nipples. I cared about my scars. Some parents don't want their kids around freaks like me.
The doorknob started turning and I threw my arms around me to try and cover myself up.
What am I gonna say?
Hi, my name is Phil. I'm shirtless and here are my nipples, Susan and Margaret.
"Oh.." His mom sounded surprised but then smirked and winked at Dan.
"Uh, hi my name is Phil."

"Hello Phil." She smiled at me and it seemed quite genuine. She seemed pretty nice and she also seemed to know what had been going on and didn't care. If anything she was encouraging Dan.
"Okay well, I'll let you two get back to whatever it was you were doing." She turned her face to Dan and mouthed what looked like  'get some'. I started laughing out loud, pretty hard and Dan's cheeks turned cherry red.
"Bye mom."
She turned and closed the door behind her.
"Your mother is crazy."

"She's pretty cool."

"Pretty cool? That was like awesome. I want my parents to be like that, I want them to play around with me like that! If my dad walked in on us he'd probably..."
My voice trailed off because I didn't feel like I had to fill in the blank for Dan.
"So he's homophobic?"

"That's putting it lightly." I laugh but when I look over I just see concern plastered all over Dan's face. I've learned to just laugh off awkward situations like this. I mean I was the one who made the joke but I thought it was pretty funny.
"Hey, if there's anything you ever-"

"Dan, this isn't counseling. In fine. It was a joke."

"Was it really? I mean I might be overreacting but you always seem to avoid the topic and wouldn't let me meet them, and..."
My heart started pounding faster. What if he found out. I mean he was gonna find out at some point but it still terrified me.
"Like are they good to you?"

"Haha that's funny. But yeah, I mean, My dads a cool dude." I cringe at those words. That was probably the biggest lie I've ever told. I didn't like lying to him. I already felt a pit of guilt in my stomach.
"Okay... Sorry.."
Now I felt extra bad. He was going out of his way to make sure that I was okay and I just shut him down. He was better off not knowing and not worrying about me anyways.
My phone buzzes and creates a little ding sound. Me and Dan's eyes both shoot to the nightstand where it lays.
"Who is that?" Dan questions
I lean over and pick up my phone and see that the message is from Meghan. My stomach flips and I immediately feel like I'm gonna hurl. She asked if we could hang out later tonight. I must've gotten clammy because Dan asks who it is again.
"Um my dad, he said I need to be home." I might have been lying about the text but I was supposed to be home a few hours back at four o'clock. It was now almost six o'clock.
"You're joking right? Why do you have to leave?"

"I don't know. He probably wants me to do some ridiculous chores or something like that."

"Do you have to go?" He looks at me and gives me these adorably stupid puppy dog eyes.
"Don't look at me like that. Unless you want to go talk to my father than I suggest you shut up."
He laughs a little before leaning over and kissing me one last time before I leave.
I throw my clothes on and practically run out of his house to avoid being seen by his mom, to avoid awkward conversation.

My finger hovers over the call button. I needed to hang out with her, but I'd feel a little guilty cause I was just over at Dan's.
Oh well
I call her up and we decide to go to the Diner. It's a place literally called the Diner. It's old fashioned with the neon lights and the black and white checkered floor. It's really cute and a perfect place for a date. I wasn't the biggest fan of eating, especially around other people. I'd get hungry occasionally but I fucked up my hunger a few years ago when I never ate. When I used to get relentlessly bullied, I decided that being skinnier might help, but instead of working out like normal people I just stopped eating. Now, I didn't really think about not  eating, I was just truthfully never hungry. The thought of food still occasionally made me nauseous.

I decide to go a little fancy tonight. When I got home, I put on black skinny jeans, and a black button up. I comb through my hair and brush my teeth before heading out the door. My dad's car wasn't in the driveway so I wasn't worried about getting caught leaving. 

I swing by her house and pick her up and then make the literal three minute drive to the Diner.
It was about eight o'clock and there were maybe nine other people in the diner, not a busy night.
"So what are you gonna get?"

"Me? I don't know. Probably a burger or something. What about you fancy boy?" She had been calling me that ever since she got in the car.
"I'm not sure I'm not really that hungry. Maybe a salad."
She looked back up at me.
"Really? Not hungry? I thought you were better."

"I am. I promise. I'm just really not hungry. I ate a few hours ago." I lied. About the eating part at least. I really wasn't hungry though. 

"You should get pancakes or something. You used to love breakfast food. Plus you could use a little extra skin on your bones. " She says the last part under her breath, but just loud enough that I'll purposely hear it.

"Fine, I'll think about the pancakes." 

"Whatever." 

"I'm gonna go pee. brb."

"You know what? I think I have to go to the bathroom too." She gives me and overly dramatic dirty look and I laugh at her.
She follows me back into the hallway where the restrooms are located and stops me by pulling on my shirt. I turn around only to be greeted by a soft pair of lips on top of mine. After a while I pull away and start to kinda whisper yell at her.
"What do you think you're doing? Meghan we are in a public place."

"We are in a hidden hallway."

"In a public place."

"You need to loosen up. Nobody is gonna see us."

"Yeah unless somebody comes back here to use the bathroom!"

"You're such a loser."

"You're drunk." I start to question whether she actually is or not.

"I'm offended. I am 100% sober. Look I'll even do a line test."
She backs up a few feet and starts walking in a straight line towards me. When she gets to me, she leans in again and starts kissing me. This time I don't fight her back. So what if somebody saw us? We were just teens having fun. It's no big deal.
Her lips were soft and sweet. The moment was sweet. She had her hands around my neck and I had mine around her jaw. The kiss slow. Not hungry, or fierce, or sloppy. Slow and lovely.
Until everything shattered.
"Phil?" My body froze. My mind went in to panic mode. I removed my lips from hers as quick as I could, but the damage had already been done. I looked up and my eyes met Dan's. I could already see all the pain that was present in his heart. What had I just done? "Dan.. It's not.. um I can explain.." He looked at me, tears started rolling down his cheeks.

A/N
Sorry not sorry

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