Lose It All

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I lay still awake, the clock reads one thirty in the morning. The night seems to go on for ever and ever. I looked to my right, where Tom lays, sleeping soundly like a baby.

He looks very peaceful. I memorised every little things about him, connecting the dots with the almost-invisible freckles on his cheek, his cheekbones that makes everybody swoon and the scar on his left forehead that he got from running into a door three years ago. 

The crinkles by his eyes and the wrinkles, the lines of human wisdom painted with the brush of time, over his forehead. His soft, thin and delicate pink lips glows in the moonlight.

His curly and soft blond hair and his stubble outlining his sharp cheekbones and jaw line. I closed my eyes and thought about all we've been through. All the fights, kisses, the teardrops and pain we've shared, and of course, all the happy and bittersweet memories. 

I shift my mind to my new engagement ring. Tom proposed to me a few months ago and we're getting married in five months, as I twist my ring, my mind then wonders off further than I thought. My future with him; our wedding, our new house, our children and their future, and our final years.

I bring myself to the present where I'm suffering my insomnia. It is only ten minutes to two o'clock in the morning, and the night seems to pass very, very slowly. 

*

Dull grey clouds swept over the city, winds blowing from every direction shook the flat's window. Cold fronts lightly blew into the flat, making me shiver. Five in the morning and the city still asleep, only a few of those who embraces the fresh, cold morning air are awake.

With a cup of tea sitting in my hands, and a blanket wrapped to my body, I make my way down to the balcony, where the city skyline blends in with the sky. 

Water vapour escapes from my mouth as I exhaled the cold air. I closed my eyes and embrace the sound of the half-asleep city. Birds twittered and the street cleaners with their noisy tools and transportation doesn't seem to bother anyone. Few cars pass quietly, and so joggers and cyclist do what they do quietly as if not to wake people so they can enjoy the pedestrian and street for longer. 

I decided that the weather is too cold to enjoy for longer. I stepped inside the cosy bedroom, smelling Tom's scent as I climb into bed carefully not to wake him. Tom's eyelashes flutters in the light of the morning.

'Hello, darling.' He greeted huskily. 

'Hi, hi, baby. I'm sorry I woke you up, go back to sleep, darling.' I whispered.

'It's alright. Come here. I miss you.' Tom stretched his arms in my direction. 

I miss you too, I thought. My feet move itself towards Tom, I lay down next to him and he pulls me closer. We both cuddled and hug for a while in silence, 'Your fingers are freezing cold,' he said, breaking the silence. He rubs my fingers together with his delicate hands. 'Thank you,' I whispered and he smiled in return. 

His warm body slid on top of me, his baby blue eyes touched me to the core. He smiled and I smiled. His hands cupping my face and pulls me for a kiss. The kiss was broken by a light chuckle coming from him. Warmth and happiness seeps trough my body. We then changed our position, with me on top and he's at the bottom. 

My eyes locked with his, I studied every outline of his face and his flaws, in which I thought it's flawless. My fingers traces and memorise every outline of his fragile face and he smiles in delight. I ran my finger down his lips, craving his touch, I pressed my lips against his delicate one, which he then licked. His hands wanders around my back and his lips wanders around my neck, he bit my collarbone and nibbled on my ear. 

My head fell back and I closed my eyes, we let out breathless moan as Tom continue to fulfil himself with my touch.  He buried his head on my neck and catches his breath, my hands brushed his hair and run around his neck, I then cupped his face and we both locked our gaze. 

We both collapsed into bed and cuddled for what seems to be ages. Tom put his arms around me, he makes me feel safe and secure. He then sang me his favourite lullaby, my eyes feels heavier and heavier. As I closed my eyes, Tom mumbled I love you, but I'm far too comfortable and too far gone into sleep. 

Tom Hiddleston OneshotsWhere stories live. Discover now