Chapter 14: The Grey Shirt

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As I walk with Andrea to the main lounge where I can see the rest of my family members chatting away with business associates and other relatives, my mind keeps on lingering to the mesmerizing look in my husband's eyes.

I glance around immediately in order to check if he is around, thanks to my lucky stars he isn't, oddly his absence somehow leaves me feeling more dissatisfied with myself and I shake my head to shake these unwanted and confusing feelings away.

In the center of the hall a big portrait had been set of my late aunt, candles were beautifully decorated on the small shelf that was in front of it where people came and started putting flowers and other artifacts in which they had great memories with her, right beside this portrait Andrea had asked someone to put in various pictures of my aunt that were now being on display, overall the environment was sober and made me feel nostalgic but there was an element of closure in it too.

They say when the dead depart from us they are no longer able to be seen by us, or unable to be prominent in their existence, but my aunt had different point of views and she made sure I believed in the same, after my parents death I was in a terrible state, anyone would be, after all I was only a six year old girl who thought the worst that could happen to someone is not being allowed to play with their dolls, the idea of losing my parents had never existed back then, losing both of them at the same time had taken a toll on me.

Everynight before bed my aunt would take me up to the roof top and we would lie down on the blanket and look at the stars, she used to tell me that many people say that when good people depart from this earth they turn into stars and constellations, but in actuality they haven't even departed, its only physical appearance that's missing, the relation, the memories, the love between us andthe departed will always be there, absence of their very being may be there but the fact that they are always alive with us, till we depart and even after isgoing to be there always, it's the way life is. The purpose of watching the stars was simple it was to feel closure and be more at peace and it did work we would sit there for hours and hours looking at the stars, joining them like a dot to dot puzzle and making various shapes, as the time to sleep would near, my aunt would hug me tight and kissing my head she would whisper in my ear, "The pain of losing would always be fresh regardless of how much time passes by, you just have to feel their existence around you, the love bond will never die, it will remain just as long as you believe in it and as long there is faith in you of wanting and trying to keep the ones you love around there is no being on this planet that can stop you".

Just as this memory trails to an end in my mind I feel and hear her words crystal clear in my ears making me turn around, and that's when I smile, I feel tears gathering in my eyes but this time they are not with regret and remorse rather than they are with comfort and the closure I had been looking for.

Various people come and I greet them generously as they enter each giving me a different form of condolence, some still are tearful, some have already forgotten the purpose and our coming just as to fulfill a formality, making me mentally roll my eyes at their arrogance and showy behavior. The spicy scent of the familiar cologne makes the hair on the back of my neck spike up and I sigh a little, soon I see Holder entering and the child inside me decided to make an appearance, before my husband could speak to me I rush forward towards Holder to greet him;

"Holder !!! you made it". i smile at my childhood friend, hearing my sound he immediately turns towards me and embraces me in a bear hug, I smile as we pull apart and then out of nowhere I punch him hard in the stomach making him hold his stomach with his arm and cower in pain;

"Oww... What the hell Ailes... that hurts"

"Well it serves you right for what you did to her, how could you, you jerk, do you know how devastated she is !"

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