Leaving (Lauren Cimorelli Fanfic)

Lost

2 days later...

Jaiden's POV

These past two days have just felt like a waste of time. I barely talk to Lauren, she only texts me short messages a couple times a day but we aren't actually talking about anything. It's so frustrating to love someone when you feel like they don't care at all anymore.

I knew she wouldn't answer the phone unless I texted her first. I pulled out my phone and clicked on our previous conversation so I could begin typing my message.

J- We need to talk. I can't sit in Texas and wonder about where we stand. Please, just call me.

I sent the message and waited. Isaac was gone so I was in the room alone. The message I sent was one that made me anxious for her call. I haven't even gotten the chance to talk to her about Noah because she is always avoiding my calls.

After about 30 minutes of waiting she finally called. Before I answered I grabbed the picture of us on my night stand and looked at how happy we were on that day. I held it in my hand looking down at it as I answered.

Jaiden- "Hey.." I said in a soft voice.
Lauren- "Hey.. What's going on? Is everything okay?"
Jaiden- "You know everything isn't okay Lauren. I could be asking you the same thing... What's going on? Because you are completely shutting me out and I feel like I am losing you."
Lauren- "Why do you feel like that?"
Jaiden- "Well everyone is telling me that you've been hanging out with Noah all the time, your ignoring my calls, and it feels like you are doing nothing to be in this relationship with me." I paused for a second waiting for her to answer. When she didn't, I spoke up again. Still speaking in a soft, calm voice.
Jaiden- "I love you and I feel like I'm losing you. What am I doing wrong because I'll fix whatever it is. I just want to be the best guy I can be for you. Just tell me. Please. Because when I'm sitting in a different state, by myself all I do is think. And thinking has turned into guessing and assuming."
Lauren- "What are you guessing and assuming?" I tried to hide the hurt in my voice but I couldn't mask it.
Jaiden- "I'm guessing that this guy Noah is there for you. He is in Nashville. He is by your side, giving you everything that I can't. And I think you are falling for him."
There was silence on the other end of the phone. Her silence hurt more than anything, because that was her confirming it without saying a word.

Lauren's POV

I felt tears start to stream down my face. I've completely broken him. I can hear it in his voice how much he is hurting. I couldn't even manage to answer him after he spoke. Hearing him so hurt by me broke my heart. I do love him and I do care about him, but I don't think I'm good for him. How could I be when I've barely showed him that I care anymore?

Lauren- "You have given me so much more then I ever even dreamed possible-" I said gently and then paused. Jaiden cut in a few seconds later. He spoke quietly.
Jaiden- "But I'm not there."
I felt the tears stream down my face even quicker then they had before. I answered with my voice shaky and cracking from the tears, painfully agreeing to what he said.
Lauren- "But you aren't here." I said back quietly.
Jaiden- "You're falling for him aren't you?" He said and I could hear his voice beginning to shake on the other end of the line.
Lauren- "I don't know."
He let out a sad laugh of disbelief. I could hear his voice still shaking due to him being upset.
Jaiden- "I don't want to be a second choice. I want you. You are my first and only choice... But obviously you don't feel the same."
Lauren- "It's not that your my second choice. You're my first choice, it's just that the lines have become blurred with Noah and I."
Jaiden- "The thing is Lauren, I said that you were my first choice but I also said that you were my only choice. Meaning I don't want anyone but you. And you can't tell me the same. I'm not blaming you... But clearly this isn't working. We aren't working."
Lauren- "Jai, no it's working I'm sorry. This isn't how I wanted this to end. I want you."
Jaiden- "I wish that was true, but in my heart I know that you are just saying that so you don't hurt me."
Lauren- "But I love you. We can't end like this."
Jaiden- "I thought the same thing when I sat in my room by myself for the past month and a half; 'that we can't end like this'. That I would fight for us so that we never had to end. But then I found out that my girlfriend of almost a year is falling for someone else... You really think that this is the way I wanted to end? You really think that I wanted to end over a phone call in a different state, miles away while you have someone to run too and I sit here alone..." He paused for a second. I know I deserved his frustrated backlash. He wasn't even raising his voice but I could hear the sadness and irritation in his voice.
Jaiden- "The last thing I ever wanted to happen was for me to move away and for you to fall for someone else. This wasn't my choice."
Lauren- "So your going to end us? Just like that?" I said now fully crying on the phone.
Jaiden- "I didn't end us Lauren. You know that I put everything I could into this relationship considering the circumstances. You ended this. I'm just the one saying the words that you are to scared to say. You are scared to break up with me but you might as well have the minute you started to catch feelings for Noah. Because all you did was string me along while I waited like an idiot."
Lauren- "I'm sorry Jai. I love you. I never wanted to hurt you."
Jaiden- "I know you didn't. But you need to go figure out a way to be happy. And if that's with Noah then I understand. But I know that you aren't happy with me. So you need to figure out what does make you happy."
Lauren- "I was happy with you."
Jaiden- " 'Was' is the key word. You were when I was there. But I'm not. So now you have to go be happy without me."
Lauren- "But you are my best friend Jai."
Jaiden- "You are an incredible person. I'm sure you will find another person to fill my space."
Lauren- "We can't even try to be friends after this? After a year of dating you don't want to even try to be friends with each other?" I said feeling so hurt.

I sat there waiting for his answer. I don't know what he is going to say, but I don't feel like it will be good. All I could think before he answered me was one thing; I lost him because I couldn't control my curiousity about what could happen with Noah.

Now we are done. I lost my boyfriend. And while I waited for him to answer, I feel in my heart that I just lost my best friend too.

A/N
Let me know what you guys think in the comments below! I love hearing what you have to say. What do you think will happen when they finish their talk?