Love, Drugs and My Dad's Bestmate! (WATTY AWARDS)

Chapter Thirty-Two; Crystals Thoughts

The days went by and I still hadn't heard or seen anything from Tyler. I know he never said he would get in touch, but it's almost as if I expected it. I was going crazy, wondering whether he was okay, wondering if I would ever see him again. All along hating my dad for what he had done, ruining my childhood and now waltzing back in to my life and destroying the only piece of sanity I had left.

I kept thinking of the last time me and Tyler made love. The way he told me he loved me, pushing his lips against my neck. I couldn't help but cry a little bit knowing that right then I had everything I ever wanted and now I have nothing. How I took every moment I was with him for granted and knowing I'd never be sure to get anymore time with him. I'm not going to lie, it broke my heart.

The worst part of not being with him was wondering if he was even thinking of me whilst I lay here, predicting what was going to happen and imagining what already was. Did he think of me? Had he met another girl already? I mean yeah it had only been 6 days but we all know how fast that boy moves on. Don't get me wrong, I hated that. But its just how he is, it makes him Tyler. Most people would consider moving on too fast a bad quality but me? I see it as trying to erase the hurt you've been through, just forcing yourself to find happiness once again.

And honestly, that's the thing that scared me the most. Tyler trying to be happy again. I wanted him to be happy more than anything but his idea of happy is sex. Sex and drugs. And the only person I wanted him having sex with, was me.

The fact that he had told me he loved me helped me to hang on a little, I know Tyler doesn't throw that kind of thing around if he doesn't mean it. But on the other hand I also wondered if he had just said it to make me happy before he left. I mean, did I really know Tyler? I wasn't entirely sure of what he was capable of and it terrified me.