rants of a shitty teen

:(

so my mom sat down with me like Friday night and said that there was this program online that I could probably do bc I only have 2.5 credits until I can graduate and she knows how much I fucking hate school and damn, I was so happy that she was finally taking my feelings into consideration. she was telling me all about how, as long as I do a certain amount of hours per week, I could probably graduate with the senior class of a bigger school nearby in May. fuck, I was so pumped. I'd skip senior year and all the bullshit that comes with it, I'd be able to have a job for that year before college and save up money because nobody told me to fucking do that (and my parents make me stay home to watch my brother bc he's almost 10 fucking years old and apparently can't stay home by himself even though all he ever does is whine and sit on the fucking Xbox all day long), I'd be able to clean more around my house bc my parents always say I never do anything and I just want to prove them wrong.

my dad just walked up to me with this fucking unnecessary attitude and said that none of that was probably gonna happen because "I should just finish school where I am since I'm struggling this much already" and "with the amount of credit hours you need, you more than likely wouldn't have the time to get them all done in time to graduate" and it just pisses me the fuck off because they were wanting to start me homeschooling next month, but if they'd pull their heads out of their asses and start me this month, I'd probably have the time to get all the shit done that I need to.

it just makes me mad because this is more time I have to stay home with my dad who yells at me for bullshit all the fucking time and says that I never get shit done even though he's the one sitting on his fucking phone on Facebook a majority of the time that he's home. this means I can't save up as much money as I need and I'm gonna go to college broke as hell. I was wanting to go to a college somewhere like Alabama or Missouri because they have programs I like, but I'm not gonna have the fucking money to pay for out of state tuition now and I'm going to have to settle for these bullshit colleges near me and possibly ruin my future.

and to top off the fucking cake I'm going through self discovery or what the fuck ever and I'm having a midlife crisis because there's so much shit going on around me and if my parents ever find out I'm anything but cishet, they'll more than likely literally kill me. it's just, I'm so confused and I don't have time for this shit right now because I'm failing algebra and hate my fucking dad and am never home to clean and my room is a fucking wreck just like my damned life and I'm so. fucking. done.

if I could just leave life without potentially hurting the few people that actually like me, that'd be great. I'm so fucking tired of everything.

sorry for this sob story lol go back to your lives 😊

✌🏻️ peace out bitches ✌🏻️