Yeah Boy And Doll Face

Sweetheart From The Past

I walked up to my desk to see a blue and red rose on my desk, with two cards.

I picked up the blue rose, my favorite, and smelled the sweet yet plain essence that filled and caressed my nose.

I picked up the the card, that matched the blue rose and opened the card and began to read the neat hand writing, that read:

Dear Bianca,
I know I said I'd leave you alone, but I don't think I can stay away from you. You're the best thing ever to be in my life. And I want to meet up with you tonight. If that's okay. So. . . Yeah
Love Vic.

I smiled. I haven't heard from him since last week and now I get a letter from him. It reminded me of the time he wrote a letter to me, Ehrenberg were in highschool. That same letter, I have at home.

I sat down at my desk, getting more comfortable and pickednup the red card.

Dear Beautiful,
Now that we've established the love we have for each other, I want to take you to dinner, and after we can hopefully take a walk around the city.
Love Andy.

This was hard. Who would I meet and spend the rest of my time with for tonight.

I wanted to go see Vic, since he just disappeared on me and pretty much anything that involves me. Then he writes a sweet letter saying he wants to meet at midnight.

Then there's Andy. Not too long ago he told me he loved me and I said it back. I think I am in love with Andy, but I have a feeling in my gut that all this will just go to shit and ruin the little happiness I have left.

Though, Vic and I have a history. Something more than a fling and he treated me right, until Mike. . . Yeah. Let's just say Mike ruined a good thing. And I ruined it myself by being who I was, playing with their hearts. I didn't kno what I was doing.

I was vulnerable after I had left France and my friends around. I left the guy that used to beat on me, so I could have a great life without him.

Bruce.

He was my FIRST love and a sweetheart, but things went south or more like went to hell, out of nowhere. He was a sweetheart from my past. He someone that I used to know. He wasn't who I thought he was.

I shouldn't be talking or even thinking about this.

Should I go with Vic?

Should I stay with Andy?

Should I give up?

I don't know what to do and when I'm by myself, my demons awake and harass me to no end. I wish I was happy.

I wish I never talked about Bruce. Then I probably wouldn't be so depressed.