❝Whatever happens, I will never stop loving you.❞
. . .in which they are broken and battered, but their love for one another is what keeps them from completely falling apart.
[BOOK TWO]
[Highest ranking: #9 in fanfiction as of 5/26/18]
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★ ★ ★
"When?" Bucky spoke quietly as he watched Marlena's sleeping figure from his spot by Steve.
The three were still on the quinjet awaiting their arrival to Siberia. They had about half an hour left of travel, and Bucky was going to use that time to figure out what was going on in Steve's mind. He was still more than upset regarding the fact that Steve had kissed the love of his life while he was away, but as Marlena had told him earlier after he had almost clocked Steve in the jaw—Steve was his best friend, and their relationship wasn't worth ruining just because the other made a mistake.
Steve glanced over his shoulder at Bucky, fairly surprised that he was speaking to him in the first place. The ride had been exceptionally silent since Steve had told Bucky about what happened, and it had been even worse since Marlena had fallen asleep. "W-what do you mean, Buck?" Steve stammered nervously over his words.
Bucky rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Don't choose now to get nervous when you talk to me."
"Just tell me what you're talking about," Steve murmured.
"When did you realize you had feelings for her?" Bucky asked, looking over at Steve, though his back was turned away from him.
Steve let out a sigh, his grip tightening on the controls. "A few months ago; it was the night Natasha and I went to dinner with you guys. She purposely spilled her tea all over the dress Natasha had made her wear, and you know Marlena—she hates wearing dresses. . ."
Bucky looked at Marlena, a small smile falling onto his face as he remembered the night and the little stunt she had pulled. "And she had a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt stuffed in her purse so she could change."
"Yeah," Steve chuckled. "Natasha was so aggravated, but Marlena found the situation to be very amusing. I just kind of. . .watched the way she smiled and laughed that night. . .and yeah. I guess I started looking at her differently after that," he finished, suddenly feeling awkward and a bit uncomfortable that he was talking about his feelings for Marlena to Bucky.
"Why didn't you ever tell me?" Bucky forced out, looking down at his hands.
As he did earlier, Steve put the quinjet on autopilot and turned to face Bucky, forcing him to meet his blue eyes. "Because at first I wasn't even sure what the hell it was. As time passed, I began to slowly figure out that I felt something for her and it scared me. You're my best friend, Bucky; you're the most important person in my life, and knowing that I had feelings for the love of your life really screwed me up. I hated myself because of it at one point in time and promised myself never to display those emotions or act on them. The only people who knew were Natasha and Sam."
"But you did act on them," Bucky breathed out, clenching his fist as if to control his building anger.
Steve noticed and frowned, running a hand through his hair. "I know, and I need you to know that I never meant for it to happen; it was just. . .so in the moment. If it makes you feel any better, though, she was the one to push me away. She was thinking about you, Buck—she's always thinking about you."
