Wattpad Blunders!

Hey, Immlaaarr!

This interview was meant to be up years ago but because of somebody's fault (I'm not going to mention any names but they start with M) it's having to be uploaded now.

Anywhore, I bet many of you know Immlaaarr- Immy to her friends-  from her LGBT stories like Juxtaposition (boyxboy) and Oasis (girlx girl) so you'll know how awesomly talented. If you haven't checked her out yet I suggest you do and you can check her out on Youtube too (ukuvision) where she talks about various things that interests her.

Sigh, I'm sorry if this isn't as funny as usual but I'm having a bad day (cue violin) but I'm going to try my best to make this as awesome as Immy would have wanted!

Err…. Who are you?

  A narwhal. I'm joking of course, I'm a human. I wish I was a narwhal, though. An albino narwhal (they're pink), much like a seabound unicorn. I'm getting way off the point here. I'm Immy Pattinson, and before you ask, no I'm not related to Robert. Nor am I an estate agents.

As you do.... And I totally wasn’t going to ask if you were in any way related to Robert Pattinson (whistles innocently…) What’s with the name?

  Immlaaarr. Well, me and my friend Emma watch a lot of Gavin and Stacey - the two characters Gavin and Smithy have nicknames for each other. They're Gavlaaarr and Smithstaaarr. Hence where Immlaaarr and Emmlaaarr came from. I now use this username for everything.

I love Gavin and Stacy! If I did that I’d be mimilaaarr (It doesn’t sound as good…). Anywhore, how did you meet my mother?

Firstly, that is the worst TV programme I have ever witnessed, excluding X-Factor. Secondly, I met your mother at night; when she was living her alter-ago albino narwhal life. Sorry I had to break it to you this way.

How dare you? *crying*How I met your mother is amazing and you lie! I was wondering, how did the rabbit get into your bathroom?

Don't even ask, it was a terrible experience involving a sledge and ice cubs. I nearly died twice, and my guitar will never be the same again.

Oh gosh, I’m so sorry. I hope you’re okay! To make up for it I’m going to grant you one wish: if you could live anywhere in the world where would it be and why?

I'm dissatisfied with the world at the moment, I do believe I'll dot around for a long time before figuring out where I'm going to live. I don't want to go to university immediately after college (I'm in my first year of sixth form) and I want to travel. I guess I'll figure it out along the way.

You speak wise words young chipmunk. So, snog, marry avoid: Alex Pettyfer, Beyonce and Megan Fox

  Kiss - Alex Pettyfer, because even though I'm gay he is fit. Marry - Beyonce, because she is just...aaaaaaah. Avoid - Megan Fox, because she would probably cheat on me with men

. Who needs Megan Fox in this life anyway? How many fingers am I holding up?

Eight. I'm not falling for the 'thumbs don't count' thing again. FAIL! I was holding up 3 :D Full fringe. Don't even go there. I have a cow-lick, why did I ever consider a full fringe? It took me months to grow it out.

I’m with you there with the full fringe. Worst mistake ever! Name a food that deserves death

Processed meat, like kebabs. Ughhh. Though I am a vegetarian, so my opinion isn't too good for this one. No meat or fish for me, thanks.

 No it isn’t. Kebabs are babes *drools*… What scares you?

 Spiders. I know it's so typical to be scared of spiders, but I practically have an emotional breakdown if one is in my room. I hate killing insects, so I feel terrible, but oh my God I cannot deal with them. I just cry, like a total baby, every time my path crosses with an arachnid.

Aww bwess you. I saw a spider in my room today. I daren’t directly kill it so I put a plastic bag over it and stood on it through the bag. I don’t know why but it made me feel like a nicer person that way… Right, suppose I felt like throwing a bunch of popcorn at you, how many do you think you’d catch… IN YOUR MOUTH?

 None. I have no hand-eye coordination, let alone mouth-eye coordination. If I caught any, I'd be too excited to catch any more.

Lol, I can just imagine that. :L Name one thing you wish would dissapear

 I'm torn between disrespect, Alzheimers and cancer. I hate all three. Alzheimers is my biggest fear; I'd take cancer over Alzheimers I think. Just because I can't stand the thought of constantly not knowing anything about myself. Disrespect is just something that bugs me.

I agree with you. I know that it’s bad to say it but I would rather have cancer too because the thought of being so dependent on someone scares me. I like to be independent… Wow this is getting emotional *wipes tears*. Any last words Immy?

Thank you for asking me to do this, it's been a pleasure! Also thank you for reading my work, it's amazing when people say they've enjoyed it. I truly appreciate it all, thank you very much.

You are most certainly welcome, my dear *tips hat like the gentleman I’m not*