Path to Deciduous (Sequel to Road to Evergreen) | #Wattys2018

f o u r t y - o n e

Songs for this chapter:

Calcum Scott - Yours

Jessie J - Who you are

Birdy - Wings
***

Lesley's P.O.V

I can't see what I'm doing. My eyes are sunk with tears and I wipe them away, probably smearing my mascara in it's way. I had to distract Adam. I had to make him go away.

My father explained everything. He wanted to show up at our door step a long time ago but he couldn't. I avoided an argument because it wasn't worth it. Overall, I was exhausted. With the way he described it, he's been my guardian angel but why does it feel like I wasn't guarded? He cheated. One mistake and it will haunt us forever. I made my amendments with him, but I got to go now- away from here. My life has been a roller-coaster this past year but it's been only going down.

The verdict was delivered. Lucian was sentenced for only three years. We won. But why does it feel like we lost? I lost.

It wasn't easy hearing about it. It was all over the news. Adam was squeezing my hand, blocking the normal flow of my blood.

"In the case of Lucian Reindl of sexually assaulting Aida Lowes, the jury has decided. The verdict was sustained but only for three years of prison. However, some will object due to the fact that the sentence is a short amount of time to serve for a sexual assault case. This news just came to us by..." I turn the television off right away, letting the news sink in. I kept waiting for him to break something, cry or do anything. Instead, he just sat still, staring at the void.

It took us four hours to break the silence. He said he was going out for air and I let him. I knew him. So, I knew that he won't be back tonight. He's going to get drunk at some bar and crash at Spencer's.

I was right. It's four a.m and he still isn't back. I crawl out of bed and grab my luggage. I still can't see what I'm doing. My heart is empty and I'm sobbing, shaking, and I'm pretty sure if I knew what dying felt like, it would be like that.

I open his drawer and grab two shirts of his, throwing them in the bag. I stop, breathing, inhaling, and exhaling. My charm bracelet lights up and I take it off, letting its jingles fill the sound of the room. I place it on the bed. I place the letter, the ring he keeps at the bedside, and then I grab a paper and a pen.

I don't know what to write. I wait for the pen to move but it doesn't. It won't. "Move!" I order it.

I know. This isn't fair. I know, my love. I know.

You've been the greatest highlight of my life but you seem to be fading away. I'm out of ink and probably out of lines to highlight so, I'm leaving. I can't stay here with these four walls closing in on me. You need to know that this is the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life. It might be wrong, I might regret it, but I know I will regret it if I don't.

This is a hard time for you and If I'm there, you will destroy me with you. I gave you all of me, and I beg you to keep it; it's yours. I need to find myself again. I need to fix myself and so do you. We can't do it together, it won't work.

I know you've been through a lot and you know I did too. That's why I know you'll be frustrated and angry at me but I hope you'll understand. I hope that you'll find it in that heart of yours that I had the chance to witness all of it's lightest and darkest secret chambers that it holds, that you'll forgive me.

My tears are dripping all over the paper ruining the ink. I take a minute to catch my breath.

You once told me that 'My heart is yours and if you don't mind, I'd like you to keep it.' I ask that from you. Find me, Adam. Find me when the time is right. You'll know it then.