Path to Deciduous (Sequel to Road to Evergreen) | #Wattys2018

f o u r t y - s i x

"I didn't want to wake up. I was having a much better time asleep. And that's really sad. It was almost like a reverse nightmare, like when you wake up from a nightmare you're so relieved. I woke up into a nightmare." -Ned Vizzini, It's Kind of a Funny Story
***

Spencer's P.O.V

I duck as a heavy thud echoes through the hallway. My jaw tightens as I place my phone aside and sprint toward the sound. I push through the bedroom door to find broken glass everywhere. My eyes follow the trail to the rug soaking a pool of blood. Adam's hands are covered in blood- in his own blood. His chest is rising heavily as he watches the red drops join the pool. I walk toward him slowly and wrap my arm around his shoulder. "I'm taking you to the hospital," I state.

"No," he answers. "Too many questions." His eyes dart to the door. "There's a first aid kit under the toilet sink. Clean me up," he helps.

I nod and walk him to the bathroom, close the toilet seat, and seat him. He never blinks, completly in awe of a shock. I run to the toilet and grab a bar of chocolate, shoving it in his mouth. He chews, taking his mind of it. I'm not even sure what I did was considered right. To hell with it, I dig out what I need and start cleaning his wounds. All the way to his elbows, lines of cuts are placed. I swallow as I smoothly wipe away the blood with water. He never flinches, staring blankly at the white tiles stained in blood.

"You need to see someone," I state. He nods.

"Are your arms in pain?"

His gaze still haven't left the tiles. "The pain inside overwhelms the outside."

"How long have you been cutting?" I ask when I notice the fresh scars along side his wrist.

"A while," he calmly answers.

"What triggered it?" I reach for the sterilizer and dab it slowly along his arm. He plants his legs firmly on the ground with a hint of a smile. "The engagement."

"It's been already two weeks. You knew it was coming."

"I know," he whispers. "I thought she would turn him down. But she's too pure for that. He doesn't deserve her."

"And you do?" I reach for the roll.

He shakes his head. "No, I don't."

"Then who does?" I start wrapping his arm.

"No one does." He looks down on me. "She doesn't deserve anyone either."

"Do you want her?"

He clears his throat. "Yes."

"Who said you can't have her?" I challenge.

"The ring around her finger. That bastard's diamond."

"A ring is made of metal. Metals can be bent, heated, broken or dissolved. And you're still blaming that damn ring?"

"She loves him." I can hear the pain behind his words.

"She loves you, too."

"How can you love two people at once?" He asks curiously. It's terryfing me of how calm he is.

"You can love two people at the same time but never at the same level," I quote.

"If you love two people at the same time, choose the second. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second." He quotes back.