ROSES

❝ that ❝

"are you okay?"

thoughts popped into thin air, ii noticed areum sitting beside me as she asked those dreadful words with her brows almost meeting as they creased. i was rather taken aback with her.

i'm fucking not okay.

i feel bad for her as she was really beautiful but when i look at her eyes, the only thing i could only see how fake she is. i know that i shouldn't be thinking this way and i'm not supposed to be prejudiced but, i can't help it. if i can only make her go away without blowing myself up, i would.

i don't know why i feel an uncertain amount of hate towards her, she didn't do me wrong and yet here i am. i just can't pin point the main problem with her alhough, what the boys talked about her weren't lies. my friends weren't also being just over reacting in describing her.

picking up the right words to say, i pulled the best smile i could make – my usual, the fake one. "i am. what makes you think that i am not?"

buy it.

the thought escaped in my head at the same time as i spoke that i was okay with the trademark smile of mine. the smile, that fooled many people's eyes. the smile that held so much inside.

"are you sure?"

i am, i am sure that i'm not okay.

"yes"

what if i said no?

"okay, just tell me if you need something 'kay?"

i nodded just to make her go away, even if i wouldn't really do it. nothing's going to change. i know why she's like this – areum confessed to me just a few weeks ago. i admit that she was really a fine lady.

an eye candy, everyone would love her. as she was like the rose among thorns. well, who couldn't and wouldn't help but like her?

she's wealthy, beautiful, smart, friendly and talented. she's got everything everyone wanted to be and was admired by everyone. she's got everyone wrapped around her manicured and skinny fingers.

she was just another jeon jeongguk in a form of opposite sex.

she was just another one who was loved with her looks and not because of what she truly was. it never once occurred to me of having her beside me, it was something i don't want. if we were to be together, it would be the greatest mistake of my life.

i used to hear how they said we would be a perfect couple. we would match – a match made in heaven as they would say, but, no matter what happens i know.

she would never understand me and we're different – very very different.

"why turn the lady down, kookie?"

taehyung, my best friend asked. i looked at him with a goofy grin in my face.

"she's too good for me"

i don't like her. she's too perfect that i'm afraid and—

i promised. i promised that i would never love again.