About an hour later we were told we could go back and see Kat. Just one at a time. I stand there frozen for a second. I look at Ida and once again she smiles.
"You can go first." She shook her head no. "I'm sure you are the one she wants to see."
Ida giggled, "Honey, just go." She pushed me towards the doors. I started getting anxiety. I didn't know what she would be like or look like but I was scared. No one knew what happened. She hasn't talked to anyone about this.
I take a deep breath before knocking on her hospital door. I didn't hear anything but I went in anyway. It was dark in the room and it only had one tiny light on. It was the night stand light, that was the only light that was on. The blinds were closed and they made sure no sun got into the room.
I see Kat in that bed motionless. Her head was turn the opposite way from the door. I heard sniffing and I knew she was crying.
"Go away Ida.." I walk closer and closer until I'm next to the bed side. I look down at her. Her face was pale and red around the eyes. It broke my heart to see Kat like this again. Once Neil got into prison and he wouldn't see her she fell into this dark deep black hole. I know she'd never recovered from that. Every time I tried to talk to her about it she would say she didn't want to hear it. I knew it was her first love. We've all been there before. I knew it would take a long time to get over it. To get over him.
I place my hand on her hand that was resting on her stomach. Kat slowly turned her head and looked at me. She squeezed my hand lightly once she saw it was me. I bend down an hugged her. I felt Kat tense up. But she hugged me back.
Her voice was weak and it shook, "I might lose my baby.." I just nod.
"I know." She cried in my arms and I felt useless. "He'll make it."
"He?" Shit. She pushed me away a little. "It's a little boy?" I just nod again. I could feel her heart break into a million pieces.
"Hey, hey, Kat. Listen," I pull up a chair that was next to the night stand. I never let go of her hand though so she knows I'm here. I sat down thinking of my next words carefully. "Kat, I wish you told me about the pregnancy before but I get why you didn't. And your son will fight this. I know it. He come from such a smart and strong women and we both know that Neil is just as strong. Not just physically either.-"
"Trevor.." I stop talking and look her in the eyes. "Neil may not be the father." My lips part a little not knowing what to say. Who else could be the baby's father? All I know is she was with Neil.
"It could be Andy.." That one really surprised me. I was absolutely speechless at this point. I sit back in the chair and stare. I don't think I even blinked. She was talking but I couldn't hear a single thing she said. I was still in shock.
"What do you mean it could be Andy's baby..." I started to think.
"I had sex with Andy before things happened. I also had sex with..Well I don't want to stay his name again." I nodded understanding. She hasn't said Neil's name ever since she gave up on him. It was hard for her to say his name a minute ago, I could tell.
"Why Andy?" She just shrugged. I knew there was a reason for it but I didn't want to push her for it. I tried to change the subject.
"Kat, what happened? The doctors say you won't talk to them or the police. I need to know what happened. We need to know what happened." She shut her mouth and looked away. I saw a tear fall from her cheek pretty fast. I knew it was something bad. I was wondering if the club had anything to do with it. I haven't talked to them since the day I moved. I told them I was done. They understood and looked away from the rule book. I knew a lot of them got put away after the FBI found hidden things in their files. But for the rest who didn't get locked away, well they tried to help me in anyway they could. We all looked away once Josh ran and now they looked away once I left. I didn't run like Josh. I told them. And if they had to kill me then they would've done it. But they really are family.
"Was it the club, Kat?"
"God, no!" I raised my eyebrows. "I don't want to talk about it Trevor. Just leave me alone."
"I need to know! You can't hide something like this! Not after knowing your child could die because of it! You need to grow up Kat! You need to stop running from your fucking problems and handle them like an adult. I understand you had to 'grow up' and mature much faster then people your age but now you have a child on the way!" She gave a laugh.
"Oh, like how you ran from the club?!" I froze once again. She knew why I left.
"That was for my fucking family! I never hid anything from my family nor the club! I couldn't have them die over something I was involved in or have me die! I have a son and wife to be! I needed to get my shit together! I provide for my family. What would they do if I died that night Kat? Noah would grow up without a father."
"Well that is how my child would be like. He would grow up without a dad. If he even lives." I take a deep breath and rub my forehead. I knew how upset she is but she shouldn't be talking like that. I pace back and forth around the hospital room slowly.
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Can someone explain to me why you can't see the photo when I upload on it? Like how do I fix that?
~XOXO~
