Trust Issues | e.d

T H I R T Y - O N E

"Don't leave again Malia. Not again." he gets on his knees grabbing onto me.

"Ethan get up. Please just get up." I try to pry his hands off of me but he doesn't let go and in the end I wrap my arms around him.

We sit there at the bottom of the stairs, the both of us not wanting to let go of eachother in the end.

"I'm not leaving anymore. I'm staying here with you Ethan."

He looks up at me with shock written over his face.

"I look at you and I want to hate you so much, but I don't because I'm in love with you. You drive me fucking crazy, but without you in my life, nothing is the same. I need you back
Ethan."

-----

"How are you feeling?" Ethan places a cup of coffee in front of me and I shrug.

"Better."

Everything feels uncomfortable and awkward now. I may have confessed that I want him back, but there's this gap between us that I just don't know how to fill.

Ethan comes up to me and I keep my head down as I stir the coffee with a spoon.

He turns me around in the chair, making me face him.

"You don't have to feel uncomfortable around me. It's me, you can talk to me just like the old times."

I grab a light hold of his face and I turn his head to the side as I inspect his jaw.

A dark purple bruise marking his face along with his busted lip.

He sighs and puts my hands down. "I'm fine." he mumbles before pressing his lips against my forehead.

I grab his hand and I drag him upstairs into his room.

He doesn't even say anything. All he does is stay quiet and follows behind me.

I close the door to his room and he faces me.

"Take off your shirt." I cross my arms and he hesitates.

"Malia, I-"

"I'll leave right now Ethan." he sighs and turns around, taking off his shirt.

He has bruises and scratches all over his back and he has a scrape on his right side. He turns around to face me and the front is just as bad as the back.

"You're so stupid." I say as I press my forehead against his while his arms wrap around my waist.

-----

"¿Estás lista?" *Are you ready?* Isabel knocks on my door while she stands there.

I put on my heels and I shake my head. "Am I making the right decision Isabel?"

I pick at my nails as she walks towards me. Her heel clicking against the floor and she takes a seat next to me.

"You're talking about Ethan aren't you?" I nod and look at her as a smile forms on her face.

"I just feel like it's never going to be the same anymore Isabel. Whenever I talk to him I just feel so awkward around him, and I never felt that way. I'm scared that it's never going to be the way it was with him."

"It's not going to be the same Malia. Look at everything you two went through. Did you really think that it would go back to normal? Shit happens and you just have to deal with it. It just takes time."

I stand up and I pace around the room. "What if, what if I've wasted too much time? What if I don't have anymore time left?"

"If you really wasted time then would you have came back? Your intentions when you came back here to New Jersey was to hurt Ethan because of what happened, but look at you now. You got him back-well, you never lost him. He lost you. You gave up too quick on him Malia, why?" She stands up, grabbing her coat and she puts it on.