The Shadow Recruit | • Editing mode •

Chapter 34

Ryan's POV

I held her hand and pulled out the door of my car for her to sit. She had no emotions on her face. Just a blank expression.

 I tucked her with the seat-belt on and ran over to the driver's seat. Putting the keys in ignition, I drove home at a faster pace. I tried changing the music but it was falling on deaf ears. I had already texted Anna to keep the essentials ready. I drove in through the main gate and quickly ran over to her side and opened up her door, unpinning her from the seat-belt. I threw the keys at my Chauffeur to park it in garage while I took her in. 

Anna's eyes widened in shock seeing Riley so numb. When we were about to climb the stairs, she tripped while placing her foot. I happened to catch her by the shoulders giving support. She felt so lifeless. I picked her up in my arms and climbed up to enter my room. I made her sit comfortably on my bed and fetched out some first aid. But then she stood up and made her way to the washroom. Meanwhile Anna came in with clothes and essentials ready for Riley. I gave her a faint smile and she patted my shoulder assuring things will turn fine.

POV end.

I headed to the washroomand locked it. I went inside the transparent shower cabin, placing both handsbeside the tap switch, turning it on. The cold water made contact with mybruised skin and it burned causing me pain. It was like the after effect of asting... All the suffocation, heaviness in my chest and the lump in my throatfinally made their way and I burst out into tears, screaming silently goingdown on my knees. 

It was dark, in my head. The thought of someone forcingthemselves of me, of raping me and shredding my dignity in seconds was hard toeven digest. My head felt pounding when I remembered my past, and the name'Omar Vega' flashed in front of my eye. My stomach cringed at the thought. Bothof them were filled with lust, like I was a prey ready to be fed upon. 

Theshower faucet fell down and I realised I was trembling badly.

 I heard avoice from the door, "Is everything alright? Do you need help? Please justsay something Riley...I want to know you are fine". I went up to the doorand rested my forehead against it, trying to control my sobs, I gatheredstrength to speak , " I am fine Ryan". 

I could feel him leaningagainst the door from outside, trying to hear my voice. I was loosing myself indarkness and I heard him say, "You don't need to be scared of what happened. I know its a very tough fight with your mind where you can see no light, but trust me...I won't ever let anything happen to you my sweetheart.Trust me on this. I will protect you every time. Just let this wave of emotionflow. Don't fight it. Let is pass and let it go." 

Those words had somemagical power. 

It was like seeing light at the end of a dark tunnel. I feltrelieved. 

I walked up to the tub and filling it with hot water I soaked myselftill what felt like eternity. My muscles began to loosen up of stress andRyan's words resonated in my mind. I found a new ray inside me. The fighter inme asked me to see the positive that I never gave up hope in both cases andthat however of a rough fight we had, he never gave up on me. He always foughtfor me. Yeah, ME. 

I realised how much I missed him. His smile curving into ashort smirk. His holding my waist. His touch. His lips...Him.. I wanted all ofhim. I remembered our kiss in the library, it was so passionate that I had nocontrol over myself. I wanted him, even when he had hurt me with Taylor. 

I stepped out of the tub and before my bathrobe I found a sweet pea fragranceresting. He had this brought in, for me? I smiled cheekily at the mirror whileapplying it all over. And then I adored myself in all my glory. 

I had to be strong, hell I was stronger. And as much as I needed Ryan, he needed me too. With this small hope, I dressed in the bathrobe and came out to find the white dress on bed.

 I quickly changed into the dress. Adoring myself in the mirror, combing my hair,I heard the bedroom door unlock. 

I turned around only to find Ryan draped in atowel, bare chested and wet hair with water dripping. I was just lost in themoment following the path of the water drop down his chest when he snapped meout. "Am sorry, I didn't know you were changing", he said hurriedlytrying to take his clothes from his cupboard.    

A/N: Trauma is bad. But again, every power is within us. To control our mind, we need to control our thoughts. The negative talk is when we see what we have lost or we never had. Positive talk is feeling blessed for what we have right now. 

I guess Riley has decided to live in the moment and love when she still has the time, when she has her someone special!

Stay tuned. 

*Spoiler alert*- steamy chapter coming next!

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