Stereotyping Rock (Stereotyping Series) | ✔️

Chapter Fourteen

Gee

"I feel like my life's crumbling," I murmured into the speaker, "Six months ago, my best friend took my virginity the night before he left for the UK. I didn't know he was going. He came back last week. Needless to say, I hate him now. But does it make a difference when I think I still love him? He loves me. He's told me so since the UK. I just... don't know if I should believe him. I don't think I should. I even made a list on why I hate him.

"I'm not done yet on the reasons on why I feel my life's becoming eradicated," I sighed, as if the person wasn't listening, "I then agreed to a deal with one of my new friends. He wanted to forget about this girl and thought if I helped him out then I'd get my ex-best friend out of my thoughts. He's going to be my fake boyfriend. He hasn't asked me out yet, though...

"Still, that's not even the half of it," I muttered, "This friend's ex-girl- well, they were never technically dating - is now my tutee. I'm teaching her in maths. She's a pretty nice girl, too. I feel like I'm wronging her with this whole fake-relationship thing... But she's now gone and my ex-best friend is now sitting with her and her best friend."

"Sweetie, can you please lose names? I'm losing track here."

"Oh, sorry," I mumbled, "Matt is my ex-best friend that had sex with me before leaving suddenly. Will is my soon-to-be fake boyfriend. Jen is my new tutee. Surprisingly, I'm not done yet.

"All four of us wound up in morning detention together," I sniffed, "Which sucks. You can imagine the rising tension in the room... So... the people in my life at the moment... not so good.

"And then there's my family."

"Tell me about your family?"

"My grandma's raised me for the last four years. Both my parents died when I was thirteen. I'm an only child. Stupid car accidents... But... I just found out last night that..." My voice trailed off.

"Talk to me, sweetie... That's what I'm here for."

"My grandma has a severe cardiovascular condition. I'm supposedly the smartest girl in the world and I can't even remember the name of the stupid diagnosis," I closed my eyes as I spoke, "The doctors say she has about a month and a half to live. Incurable. We found out about it on too short notice."

The first tear since the news made it's way down my face, "After my birthday in three weeks, the last birthday I'll spend with her, I'll be on my own... It's fucking stupid. I'll just have turned eighteen when my grandma dies and I'm forced to live life on my own."

The unknown lady whispered, "How can we help you?"

I sniffed and shook my head to myself. Then, into the phone, I replied, "Give me three amazing reasons on why I shouldn't kill myself?"

***

Sandra on the Phone's List for Why I Shouldn't Commit:

1) I'll leave Julia all alone in that idiotic school.

2) Grandma definitely wouldn't want to find me in Heaven and make me explain why I joined her so soon. 

3) She believes that I'm capable of killing myself but that I'm smart enough to know my own reasons why I shouldn't. 

So, yeah. I'm not going to commit suicide. But it's high on my list of thoughts at the moment. How easy would it be to take my own life and for all these troubles to go away? 

But then I'd be just like the idiot Hannah Baker, who died under a bunch of misunderstandings. That's what I think has gone wrong at the moment. Everyone's misunderstood each other. So at 4:23am on Wednesday morning, wearing a onesie and bedsocks, I made two decisions.