Resolution

74. Heart Beats

"I wanna run where no one else can follow me; find a calm from the wreckage and the danger of this swelling sea."

Song: Heart Beats

Artist: Johnnyswim

“You should eat something, Harry,” I said gently.  I leaned across the counter while I tried to coax some food into him.  He sat across from me, staring blankly at the plate I’d made up for him.  His good mood from yesterday hadn’t seemed to survive the night, his infectious glow dimmed slightly.  Our day yesterday had been spent goofing around, the lighthearted mood seeming foreign and magnificent all at once.  We hadn’t done a whole lot besides tease each other playfully and laze around his house, but it had been perfect.

He’d said the words yesterday I had never really expected him to when he’d asked to be my boyfriend.  It was something I’d wanted for ages but never really fixated on because I already knew, deep down, he was so much more than the simple title implied.  He’d been mine for a long time now, just as I had been his.  I’d given him my heart a long time ago, and he’d done all he could to keep it safe.  Nothing was really different now besides our title.  I was his, and he was mine. 

I wished some of that good feeling had made it through the night, but it hadn’t.  We’d fallen asleep completely tangled in each other as always, our bodies pressed together in a desperate need for each other.  We still hadn’t been together physically, but it wasn’t a huge deal.  Simply spending the day with Harry, finally happy for once, had been more than satisfying.  The time would come when we could be together again, but it wouldn’t be until after this mess had been settled.  I knew his mind was still too preoccupied with all that had happened and I didn’t want to rush him even though I felt like I was going physically insane with need for him. 

The mere thought of his body on mine sent a heat wave through me, but I shoved the thought to the back of my mind.  We had more important things to deal with, like going to court in only an hours time.  Finally, we would at least know what his fate would be. 

“I’m not hungry,” Harry said, responding to my statement.  He looked a bit pale and my heart clenched painfully. 

“It’ll help if you eat something, babe,” I urged. 

“I said I’m not hungry!” he snapped, slamming his fork down on the counter.  I jumped slightly, flinching away from the sudden volume of his voice.  He blew out a heavy sigh and pushed his face into his palms.  I didn’t say anything to acknowledge his outburst.

“I’m sorry,” he muttered, his words stifled by his hands.  My lips pinched together as I moved around the counter to come stand behind him.  I brought my hands to his shoulders to massage the tight muscles there. 

“It’s alright,” I said honestly.  I knew he wasn’t lashing out at me.  His shoulders were hunched slightly as he leaned back into my touch, lifting his head from his hands. 

“I just want to get this over with,” he said.  My hands moved from his shoulders to slide around his chest so I could hug him from behind.  My lips pressed into his shoulder lightly before I spoke.

“I know, babe.  A few hours and this will all be done with.”

“Unless I go to jail,” he muttered.  His muscles tensed when he said the word ‘jail.’

“You won’t go to jail because you’ve done nothing wrong,” I reassured him, shaking my head slowly.  “We’ll go to court, get this sorted out, and come home.”

“Okay,” he said.  I got the sense he was getting tired of talking about it.  I tilted my head to the side to kiss the base of his neck lightly.  He sighed and tilted his head to the side, urging me on.   My lips trailed farther up his neck, pressing light kisses up his skin.  I let my teeth sink lightly into the space just below his ear, earning a quiet groan from him.  My lips continued their gentle assault on his neck while my hands slid down his chest, my palms pressing lightly into his firm muscles.  He hummed deeply in appreciation.