I Hope You Dance (Artemi Panarin)

Not Ready Theory

Gabriella

After a long day of practicing I finally had a chance to catch a home game. The Blackhawks season was starting to wind down and I wanted to catch a few more games before I couldn't anymore.

I go home and let Hank out so he can use the bathroom and I pull on my panarin jersey. After being in a leotard for hours on end it was nice to be in something that swallows me instead of the other way around.

After I make myself pretty I feed my doggy then head to the United Center. I find Lindsey waiting for me in the corner and I take my usual seat.

"Hey girly, long time no see" she admits.

"Yeah, it's been a while. I've just been crazy busy" I admit.

"What have you been up to" she wonders.

"Well I'm a ballet dancer now" I shrug.

"Seriously? That's so cool" she smiles.

"I love it. I mean it's nothing right now. I've only been training for a few weeks, and before that, never, so it's a process. But everyone at the academy is so nice and supporting. The instructors are awesome and so are the dancers, It makes it a lot easier for me" I admit.

"You sound like a busy woman" she nods.

"I'm definitely keeping my mind going" I admit.

"And what does Artemi think about all of this" she asks.

"What is that supposed to mean" I wonder.

"You know, you being on the go all the time. Most girlfriends and wives of the players don't work because there would be no time for everything to get done and there still be couple time" she explains.

"That seems a bit silly, don't you think? We all get 24 hours a day and that's more than enough time if you use it wisely. I can meet with clients and talk at a school before practice then make it to the game and hang out with Artemi all in a day" I defend.

"That's doesn't sound healthy, when do you sleep" she asks and I swallow hard. Here we go again with the panic attacks.

Before I can answer Amanda comes over and I let out a sigh. Saved by the bell. We catch up a little and they drop the puck for the game. Her and Lindsey talk the night away as I stare out the glass window to the ice. I keep to myself like most times and let the world drown out. I find Artemi on the bench watching the game so intensely. He won't admit it but he loved the game so much. He wants to be the best and he was with the best team so far. I don't know a lot about hockey, but I know he's a great player and that made me happy to think about.

"Gabriella" someone yells and I snap my head around. Amanda and Lindsey were sitting there staring at me.

"Yes" I ask.

"We've called your name like three times" Amanda insists.

"Sorry, just lost in my head again" I defend.

"You sure spend a lot of time in there" Lindsey admits.

"There's a lot to think about" I insist.

"Isn't that the truth" she laughs.

The game comes and goes and although Artemi had a goal and a assist the team lost. Usually when they lose he's in a crappy mood and I wasn't sure if I should wait for him by the locker rooms.

"Are you coming" Lindsey asks as she picks her things up. Well I guess that made things easier for me.

I collect my stuff and follow her down. We wait and one by one the guys come out. Some say hi to me and others grab their significant others and head home. It was a hard fought game and one I defiantly wished we won.

Eventually Jon comes out and we talk for a little. He seemed to be in a pretty good mood which made me feel better but we definitely had a lot to talk about in our next meeting as it appears.

Finally Artemi mopes our of the locker room. His head down and his shoulders slumped as he drags his feet, I hated when he was sad like this.

"Hey" I say softly. He looks up and a smile comes across his face when he recognized me.

"Gabby, you're here" he whispers.

"Yeah, I had to watch my man score a goal" I smirk.

He pulls me into a hug and although he was wet and smelly I felt so comfortable. He squeezes me tight like he does when he's upset so I rub his back.

"You did so good" I whisper into his ear.

"Thanks. I kinda figured you were here because I played better" he teases. We break apart and I rest my hands on his shoulder.

He stares into my eyes and I can tell that he really wanted me to be here tonight for some reason. Maybe he's feeling homesick again or maybe he's just tired.

"Do you want to come back to my place" I offer.

"You know I would love to" he smirks.

"I was hoping" I admit.

He follows me over to my place and we get inside. The blinds were closed like always and the place wasn't too torn apart by Hank.

Artemi and my dog, or maybe his dog now, I don't know, go into the living room as I made us a pot of tea. I shed my pants and put on a pair of shorts but keep the jersey on because I loved it. I pour two cups and join them as they watched tv. I hand Artemi his cup and he thanks me before taking a long drink.

"How was training today" he asks me.

"It was fine. I'm kinda sore but that just means I'm doing something right" I giggle.

"What hurts" he asks.

"Mostly my legs" I admit. He pulls my legs into his lap and starts to massage them. Was this a normal thing to do? And if it is where was this the last seven months when my legs hurt?

"What are you doing" I finally ask as I watch his hands dig into my legs.

"I want to make you feel better" he claims.

"Why" I wonder.

"Can't I just want to make you happy" he questions.

"You always make me happy" I insist and he smiles at me. He moves his hands from my calves to just above my knee. I flinch a little causing him to stop for a second before he goes back to digging his fingers into my muscles.

"Damn girl, you're muscles are so tight" he says.

"I know. They call it stretching yet nothing stretches" I shrug and he chuckles. He moves his hands up and I start to squirm. I wasn't uncomfortable, I was just confused. Why he was doing this and why I liked it so much.

He grabs my bare leg and starts to kiss it. I watch as his long eyelashes slowly close as he moves his lips up my leg slowly.

My heart starts to beat faster as he starts to move to my thighs.

"Artemi" I whisper and he looks at me.

"If you don't want to go any farther just say it" he insists.

"I don't... I'm sorry" I sigh letting my head fall.

"Baby, do not apologize" he says lifting my head so I had to look at him. "There's nothing wrong with no wanting to go there yet" he assures me.

"But that's not fair to you" I defend.

"What's not fair is me being with anybody else and having sex with them. Because I don't love them so it wouldn't mean a thing to me. I want you, I've always wanted you, and I am going to wait until you're ready. I promise" he says softly caressing my cheek.

"I love you so much" I smile.

"I love you too. Are you ready for bed" he asks and I nod. He grabs my hand and pulls me to my room. I crawl into bed and he crawls in beside me.

"Hey Artemi" I ask.

"Yeah baby" he whispers.

"Can you hold me" I ask.

"Yeah" he replies softly. He pulls me into his chest and I finally felt at peace again.