I was here.

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"I want to die." Kendall said this as she laid there, crying in your arms.


Kendall and you were the best of friends, you cared for one another so much. Sometimes some people would actually mistake you two as a couple instead of friends. 


"Why do you say that?" You replied after a few seconds, looking at her with a concerned look, trying to think of what to say next. Kendall wanting to kill herself just baffled you completely that you had a mental shut down for a few seconds.


The two of you were currently at a hotel, somewhere in Paris, France. She was there for a photoshoot and you went ahead and joined her because she requested it. The sweet silence the night brings was a nice thing to enjoy in this loud and flashy life she has, so she cherished it by staying at the balcony of the room you two rented. 


"I'm tired, all this work is killing me. Something I love to do slowly becoming stale for my taste, I still love to model don't get me wrong but I want to do other things in my life. I don't feel like I can do it though, I feel useless. I don't know why I'm thinking these things but I guess it's just my insecurities kicking in." You looked at her as she talked and brought up every single insecurity she had. You looked at her and saw how her eyes mirrored the bright sky above, the stars shining down upon you two and a shooting star passing by. You saw all of this in her eyes, she had such big dreams for her life but she thinks she can't do it.



"If you are tired of what you are doing, and feel like it's slowly killing you. Take a rest from it, you don't need to do it constantly. You set yourself up quite nicely in life, people love you, yeah not all the people of the world but a good percentage support you. I can also say that those supporters care for you quite a lot and will support you through anything. So go ahead and do what you want, you are a free person." You told her while still looking at her eyes, she was still looking at the midnight sky above but you can see your image in her eyes. She was listening to you, and her mouth started to curve upward. You placed your hand on her cheek and wiped away some of the tears going down from her eyes.



"I want you to know that people care for you, and they love you a lot. I know that they'll support you, I'm sure of it. Don't think at all of the probability of you not being able to do it because you can. You just got to give a few good pushes to get things moving." You continued to say all of this while looking at her, she was now focused on you. Her eyes, now fully focused not at the sky above but to you right next to her. Now fully smiling, she was still crying but she now had a smile on her face so that means what you are doing is working.


"Thank you for that Y/N. At least I know that if I'm sad, I can talk to you. You always seem to cheer me up, I mean it. You are one of the sweetest people I've met ever. If I was single and didn't see you as family, I'd date you. No, marry you. I'll go prepare to sleep, don't stay out too long." She told you as she kissed your cheek and went inside to go prepare for a good night's sleep. She was attached to this one person, you didn't know who and you don't wanna think about it. You love her, you want to tell her that so much, but you fear that telling her will just destroy everything you have with her. So you decided on being friends, painful, yes. However, it beats supporting her from a far. 


"So many are there to support you through your lows and highs. However, who is there to support little ol' me? Plain old me, who isn't really doing much for you Ken... I wish I did more, I really did. I was alway there to answer your pleas and calls for the help you desperately needed yet who'd come when I shout my plea? I feel as if I'll be above there with the stars soon. I feel weightless and that I can fly if I jump from here, but I know that something much worse will happen. Will you save me from my terrible fate?" You just began ranting quietly outside, hoping she wouldn't hear at all. 


7 months ago, you were diagnosed by your psychologist friend with depression, you didn't know if they were really kidding or not but quite recently you've been thinking of ending your life.


You never really felt anyone care for you, you had a small band of friends and they were it just a small band of friends who'd gather up from time to time but you don't really consider them close enough. You have Kendall but she doesn't seem to really care for you. She always seem busy and if she invited you somewhere, it would end up to talking about her problems. You lost contact with your family ages ago and they didn't bother to try and contact you for a long time. You went inside the hotel room, and went to bed. Time passed by quickly while you were thinking to yourself outside, Kendall was already sound asleep on her bed. You went to yours and laid there. 


You closed your eyes, and let the darkness take over you. Sweet, blissful, and peaceful sleep finally embracing you.









"I miss them." Kendall told you, crying into your neck, her arms around you and holding you tight, not wanting to let go.

"They don't deserve you Kendall, if they really cared for you. They would have thought, twice, trice, quadruple, quintuple, and so on times before they decided to cheat on you. However, they obviously did not." You tried to comfort her, after all, she was your friend and someone you love.
You wish you could beat that person up but you are too preoccupied with a hurt and crying Kendall too do anything.

You two were currently at another hotel, somewhere in Boston, Massachusetts. She wanted to get away from the media, to be alone. So that's what you did. You asked her if she wanted to go to Boston to rest and stay away from the media for awhile and she immediately agreed.

"I want to die Y/N this pain is too much." She told you, she looked a dark corner of the room. She asked to keep the lights closed but the blinds slightly open, so you made her request come true, you turned off the lights and kept the blinds slightly open. You looked into her eyes and saw complete darkness, despair, and pain. You placed your hand on her shoulder and your other hand on her back, slowly drawing circles.


"People love you Kendall, so many do. What's better compared to that person is that these people care for you. They are willing to defend you against the masses of hungry animals trying to feast off your controversies. They are there for you as well as I. Don't forget that, I'll be here by your side all the way. Until you finally see me fade away to the sweet end." You told her, accidentally saying what was on your mind in the end, your eyes widened for a few seconds but it immediately went back to normal.

"Thank you Y/N, that means a lot to me. You singlehandedly cheered this girl up! Let's go for McDonald's!" She exclaimed going to the restroom to prepare for a trip to McDonald's.

"If only you knew of the actual thoughts I had, sometimes I wished you'd pay attention to all the hints I left for you. All the pieces left for you to place together and finally solve the puzzle I left quietly open for you. I can feel myself slowly fading Kendall. Will you save me or will I fade away?" You murmured as you brought out a letter from your bag. It was a letter with all the things you wanted to tell her. You wanted to give this to her now, but seeing that she is in such a great mood all of a sudden. You didn't want to ruin it at all, so you placed the letter back in your bag and went off to dress up and get ready for another trip to McDonald's.




"Where is Y/N?" Kendall asked your good friend Tom, where you were. You disappeared from the face of the Earth, two weeks ago. After a week, Kendall grew so worried that she begun looking everywhere for you. She even asked her friends, to keep a look out for you, and to inform her immediately if you were spotted somewhere. As the sun struck the window of her room in her comfy home. She had one thing in her mind. To ask Tom where you were, so here she was now. Trying to get a answer from Tom.





NOTE:
You guys decide where Y/N is.



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