Saving Chester Bennington

Chapter 38

Chapter 38

 

Mike’s POV

          He laid out on his bed. Summer had just started. He hadn’t talked to Chester ever since his dad had kidnapped him. They’d had to cancel the show they had planned on spring break. The band barely practiced anymore. None of them could really accept the fact that Chester was gone. He’d become such a big part of all of their lives. He closed his eyes as he remembered what they’d done at their last practice. They’d sat around a fire outside in Dave’s yard. They’d only talked about Chester. Nothing else. And Mike had taken one of the pictures he’d drawn of Chester and burned it. It was his favorite one. The one where Chester was lying in the grass looking up at him with his glasses crooked. Each one of them had said goodbye to their friend differently. And they’d all said something that he’d told them that meant something to them.

“He told me no matter what I did, he’d always forgive me. Because of what I did that night at the show.”

“Told me that he’d always thought I had good in me. Even after all I did.”

“He told me that he trusted me from the start.”

“He told me that he was lucky to be part of our group. That this is what he lived for.”

“He told me that I was his angel. Because I saved him from everything that had happened to him.”

          Mike let more tears fall as he read through the texts he and Chester had sent to each other one day during school. He had looked through all his pictures already. He slowly reached for Chester’s phone and clicked it on. The lock screen was of him and Chester. He typed in ‘MikeShinoda’ and then hit the photos on Chester’s phone. There weren’t that many. Just some of Chester and Mike grinning. Then there was one of him leaning up against the locker at school when he was in eighth grade. Chester had liked him since then? He moved to Chester’s notes. There was one with his name on it.

          Mike Shinoda. I really hate him. I hate him and what he does to me. But he’s really cute. Is that bad? He’s the perfect image of a guy. He beats the shit out of me but I have a crush on him. I don’t get why. I’m thinking this week might be the week. I might not have anything more to add to this note or anymore of them. I think I’m done. Tomorrow, I’m going to drop the note into his backpack. Maybe he’ll do it. Maybe he won’t. I just want someone to appreciate my music. I hope he does. Next time I hear it, hopefully I’ll be in heaven.

          It was last year in June when the note had been written. He slipped Chester’s phone back into his pocket and then rolled over on his bed. Chester was gone, he’d never see him again. It was eleven at night. He looked up at the ceiling. He turned to the piece of paper on his nightstand. Their teacher had assigned them an essay on a time when they weren’t sure what to do in a situation and how they handled the situation. He picked it up and balanced it on his book.

          I knew a boy for a long time. The one day he told me that he cut his wrists. I wanted to help him but I felt like someone else should know about it. His parents didn’t listen to him or talk with him. I didn’t want him to feel embarrassed about what he did. So I kept it a secret and helped him in any way I could….”

          It went on to explain how he had helped Chester. He missed the other boy so much. He put the paper back down on his nightstand. He buried his head into the pillows.

          “Goodnight Chazzy. I’ll always love you. No matter where you are,” Mike said quietly as he pulled the blanket up to his chin and shut his eyes.

Chester’s POV

          He lied awake in bed at eleven at night. He had his door locked but his dad was passed out downstairs. He missed Mike. And Rob. And Dave. Everyone. He missed them all. He sniffed and turned on to his side. He was cold without Mike next to him. Tears pricked his eyes and he squeezed them shut. He thought back to each member of the band. Dave’s grinning face as he laughed about something stupid. Brad and his stupid hair. Joe playing around as a DJ. Rob grinning at him when Chester tried to shoot a basket. And Mike’s smile whenever he saw him. One full of love. They were all gone now.

“You’re beautiful. Listen to me, when I tell you that you’re perfect.”

“You have an amazing voice. If people don’t see that, then they’re stupid.”

“You two are the weirdest people I have ever met.”

“It’s obvious isn’t it? If we want what’s best for the band, then we need Chester.”

“You’re a good guy Chester. The band’s lucky to have you.”

          His eyes filled. He wanted to go to his phone and see the pictures of Mike and himself. He wanted to have some memory of the people who had made such an impact on his life. The people who had cared for him. He buried his face in the pillow. He thought of Mike.

          “I love you Chazzy.”

          “I’ll never let anyone hurt you again.”

          “You’re safe with me. I promise.”

          “I won’t let you fall. You’re with me. You’re ok.”

          But now he wasn’t with Mike. Now he was alone. He didn’t have Mike to protect him. He thought back to the band. He wondered what they were doing. Were they still thinking about him? He didn’t want them to be sad but he hoped they were. He missed them so much. He would be heartbroken if they weren’t thinking about him. He had a feeling Mike was thinking about him. He sighed as he plugged in the headphones to the iPod he’d managed to find left in the drawer of his desk. It was one of the little ones that couldn’t communicate with anyone but he needed music. He had opened his old account on iTunes and bought all the songs that Dave had gotten up on iTunes. He turned them on now and listened to Mike rap. He could recognize each individual note of each instrument. He could picture each member of the band grinning as they played. Tears welled in his eyes as he heard himself sing and then Mike back him up. After about ten minutes he turned the music off and pulled the blanket up to his chin.

          “Goodnight Mike. I love you. I always will. I hope you do well in life. I hope you guys find another person to sing. I hope you become what you always wanted.”