Tongue-Biter

Easter

One of the worst things about being anything other than Christian is when your whole family is Christian. Granted, my family isn't made up of strict Catholics, they just believe in God. I, however, do not. I have gotten up the courage in the past to tell my parents about my sexuality and gender, but if I told them that I was anything other than Christian...Ha! They'd skin me alive! I'll say " Hey, Dad, I'm not Christian!" He'll say " What the fuck?! You are a Christian!"
Pretty much how it would go.
My mom? She wouldn't care. She never does. And that's both relieving and depressing, depending on what she doesn't care about. Like my sexuality. Neither one of my parents, or any of my family, was surprised. My gender? My mom accepted it. My dad? Hell no. I gave my dad and Richelle the silent treatment for two weeks because I was so pissed and depressed. It was one of my lowest points.
Anyway, what I hated most was Good Friday. I'm not even religious, why can't I eat whatever the hell I want to? I didn't care for Easter either, besides the candy. Where there's candy, there's a way.
So here's how holidays go, we go to Richelle's sister's house. I talk to my "cousins" a little, I get on my phone, and for the rest of the trip, I isolate myself in Madeline's bedroom while everyone's outside talking and swimming, waiting for the whole thing is over.
I know I may sound like a dick, but I don't see the point of Easter. I mean, I know it's for Jesus or whatever but, really? What is religious about finding candy eggs? I don't know.
Since I mainly isolate myself, I get to think, which can either be extremely useful or extremely harmful. I remember that I have to see my therapist soon and I can talk to.her about my problems. But the closer it gets, the more I want to push these feeling down. It's nothing. It's always nothing.
I wasn't too upset. I was, for once, proud of myself. I was a year clean of cutting! I haven't cut myself in a whole year! I have thought about it, but I fought it! I'm really proud of that!
If only I could help other people do the same...

* To be continued*