Once I finally manage to slam the door shut I slide down the wood onto the cold tiled floor. My hands are shaking violently and I drop my head into them. I feel physically sick, I can’t get my head around what Is happening. How did he find me here? Why has he turned up all of the sudden out of the blue? I can still hear him from the other side of the door and Cheryl crouches down to me she pulls my hands away from my face and she looks as terrified as I feel.
“Who is he? Kimberley what’s wrong?” She asks pleading for an answer. She still has both my wrists in her hands, my eyes can’t meet hers and the worry in her voice is becoming even more apparent then it already was. “Kimberley? Tell me!”
“He’s… he’s Jason” I finally tell her and her mouth drops open, her hands tighten around my wrists and there’s a moment of silence, she’s probably trying to get her head around everything just like I am desperately trying to accomplish. There’s another rumble through the house and the letter box is pushed open before I hear the all too familiar voice being projected through the small gap.
“Please hear me out, I’m not here to cause trouble” That’s funny isn’t it? If that’s not why he’s here why is it? He looks for trouble; he craves some sort of drama in his life, he always has. Why is he here then because no matter what he says he can’t be here for his daughter. He’s been given opportunity after opportunity but he’s ruined every one I’ve gave him these past three years to see her, maybe after seeing how well we’re both doing after finally moving on he’s seen us both in the papers and he’s thought about the many opportunities he could get if he’s to enter my life again. I don’t know why he’s here. I wish he would just go back to wherever he came from.
Unfortunately my hopes aren’t coming true, I can still hear his voice from outside pleading for me to listen, when I pleaded all those years ago did he stop pounding his fist into me or stop with the constant accusations? No. His voice is full of need, he’s craving sympathy and he’s not going to get any of those things. “Go in the living room” Cheryl says calmly getting up from the ground. I quickly get up and she reaches for the door.
“What are you doing? You can’t let him in here”
“Go in the living room, I’ll make him go”
“I’m not leaving you with him, the door isn’t getting opened” I roughly push her to the side but she ignores me and pulls it open. As it creaks open just a tad we’re both knocked backwards with some force as he uses all his strength in him to barge into the hallway.
“Get out” I shout but he doesn’t budge.
“Please Kimberley, you have to hear me out” Both his palms are pressed together as he desperately tries to talk to me, I don’t want to hear anything he’s got to say. He’s hardly changed since the day I met him, since the last time I saw him apart from his arm covered tattoos, his dark hair is still styled almost exactly the same as it was back in the day, short and basic. I mean he could of made an effort, he’s stood here in a t-shirt and a pair of tracksuit bottoms for gods sake. I look into his eyes and I see Paisley in them, that’s all though. She looks nothing like him.
“She doesn’t have to do anything, get out me house before I call the police!”
“Call them!” he throws both his hands in the air but still doesn’t leave. I wasn’t ready for this, I look at him and every memory I’ve shared with him comes flooding back, all the bad, none of the good. I remember that face curling up in rage as he terrified me at every chance he could get. I prayed I wouldn’t have to see him ever again and I started to believe I wouldn’t but here he is stood in my house. “I want to see my daughter”
“So you’ve remembered her have you?” I scoff bitterly. “She doesn’t even know you exist you’re dead to her. You’re dead to both of us. If you think I would let someone like you around her you’re mistaken” He flinches at my harsh words. I can see how much they’ve hurt him but good, that was what I was intending.
