When Stars Cross

Chapter 30

Chapter 30

Jordan was still seeing Angelina?

It felt as if someone had just ripped my heart into tiny peices and stomped on them over and over. I had finally admitted my feelings, trusted Jordan with my entire being, and let his stupid tricks fool me again. Except this time, I felt it corsing through my veins, and I finally felt for once that everything was coming together. The boy that I had been in love with felt passionatly about me aswell, or so I thought. He made me believe that every word that has ever came out of his mouth was true. My body was healing and so was my heart, and he went, and smashed everything to peices with a couple of sentences.

Maybe it wasn't that he had an alterior motive to get in pants or destroy me like I had originally thought, but just the simple fact that he truly didn't care for me at all. And maybe I knew that from the very begining, going all the way back to months ago when I had first met him at the audition, he was so rude and nasty to me for no apparent reason. When he flipped out on me as we attempted to watch a movie, and his harsh words cut deep like a knife, targetting my every insecurity. When he broke my heart the first time at the hospital, leaving me alone and numb. And finally, now. I think I always knew, but never wanted to admit the facts.

It was like he was fishing with my heart. At times he would reel me in with his sweet words, soft lips, and kind actions, and then he would loosen the line and send me flying back all in a matter of secconds.

Just as I was about to slip away from the soul-crushing scene that I had accidently encountered, the heavy hospital door closed before I could sneak away. His turned around abruplty, startled by the loud sound. His face lit up when he saw me, and I hated the was my heart skipped a beat. This boy was playing me like a fiddle, why couldn't I just get that through my thick skull.

"What are you doing out here?" He asked sweetly. Then it all clicked in my head. I knew exactly how to end the vicious cycle. It wouldn't be easy, but it had to be done. A clean break was exactly what I needed. I had to cut the line.

"I wanted to talk to you about what I said earlier." I started shakily, not knowing if I could pull this off.

His face slightly dropped and worry clouded his crystal blue eyes. I gulped audibly.

"I think this is all one big mistake. When I woke up, I didn't feel like myself, you know? The medication and irrational thinking made me say some things that I didn't really mean." I trail off, not wanting to continue.

Even after all he's done, I still couldn't hurt him. I'm so weak, I thought. Suddenly, I felt an anger rise within me, and I decided I had to do this. Not for anyone else, but myself.

"Jordan, you destroy everything in your path, and I don't want to be next." I bit out. He physically flinched at my words, making me feel guilty for a split seccond before all of the horrible things he's done to me came rushing back.

"Is, is this something your dad said?" His voice shook, and it sounded almost too realistic.

"No, this has nothing to do with my dad. I...I just can't love someone like you." I said quietly, giving the final blow that I knew would send him running.

It worked, Jordan was left speechless, and when I should have been feeling powerful, I really felt like crap. But what was done, was done, and I couldn't take back what I said. For the first time, I was the heartbreaker, and it didn't fell as good as I'd planned.