Chapter 43

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"If there was no sadness, there would be no value to happiness"

"If there was no sadness, there would be no value to happiness"✨

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(A large amount of swearing used. :] )

I went straight outside. I needed air. No, I craved it. How long could I keep keeping everything in? How the fuck was I even here, crying? I had no idea. It was a miracle I had made it this far- even if I was on the verge of losing it. I'd been pushed way past my breaking point, but no one cared enough to fucking see that! No one fucking cared!

I was all alone. I was very scarily aware of that. And all of a sudden, the world felt so big, and I felt like so small. I'd never felt like this, ever, in all my existence. I felt like nothing. Dirty looks was what I was going to be receiving 'till the end of my school life. And it wasn't even that I was pissed about. I was angry because people were gonna believe a make-belief fucking story that was complete and utter bullshit!

I didn't want to move. I knew these kind of rumours could cook up! I knew it.

Alyssa was a bitch. Why couldn't she keep her ugly mouth shut? What did I ever do to her that earned her so much hatred for me?

My mind was whirling right now, so many thoughts passing through my head each second. I was in mixed emotions right now, lost, confused, sad, angry- I couldn't think straight for gods sake! It was going into overdrive, and I could see myself having a migraine soon enough. But even that was not able to stop the flood of memories flooding in.

Like that memory of when I'd come back from work, assuming everyone was asleep. That's where Aaron had jumped on me, a fucking broken beer bottle in one of his hands. I will never forget the way the glass of the bottle cut my face. I had to say that I got into a fight with Jordan to get everyone's backs off me, especially Cody's. Thankfully, Jordan had kept his head low and agreed when I called him. He didn't ask about anything, and that was why I'd always thought of Jordan as another younger brother.

But that scar, well it had only actually been fully invisible about a whole year later after trying to clean the cut. Now, you couldn't really see it unless you looked extremely closely and with much precision. And even then, it just looked like that was a thin line that did not get tanned.

"Alexis-" Cody's voice rang in my ear and he placed a hand on my shoulder. I shook it off immediately, startled by the contact. I relaxed a second later, but still didn't face him. How could I? His big sisters face was tear stained, and an ugly scarlet- something that occurred when she was mad- was etched all over her face.

"Cody. Leave. Now." Those were the only words that I could get out without choking because of the lump that had formed in my neck.

"Alexis, I can't see you like this- seriously." Cody began, his voice hoarse, like he was about to cry. I swerved around and to face him and saw a few tear drops, slowly rolling down his cheeks. I didn't want him to cry. I couldn't stand seeing him fucking sad because it killed me inside.

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