The Demon's Whispers

46- Strawberry & Lemon.

Leah POV

Falling into the couch, I let out a cry of frustration. Anger spiking my soul as I held my head into my hands.

16 nights and 15 days later, I was still no further ahead!

"Come on! You have to do this! You have to.." I trailed off looking at my stomach, as if it had a beacon of both warmth and danger.

I had been to the clinic every day, I had walked into the clean environment, slumped on the seats, held my breath.... and then tore out of there. With my mind muddled with Zak and a future.

It wasn't fair to allow my brain to think like that, to give me any inclination of hope when I knew there couldn't be any, but I was. I knew I needed to do this, to go through with my decision, but the idea of upsetting Zak tore a wound deep in my flesh. After all, this was his baby too.

This morning, I hadn't even left my home, dressed and armed with everything I will need, I got as far as the door before my head threw up Zak's face and because of that? I crumbled into the nearest seat, where I'm still holed up now.

He wasn't here in person, but he was definitely here in spirit.

Glancing at my phone, abandoned on the coffee table, I wondered how many times he had tried calling. The first day it has been at least 30 times, but the number was dwindling, and I knew eventually, they would stop and I would be replaced.

But I don't want to be replaced.

We can't have everything in life. Grabbing my phone, I pulled myself out the seat and set a determined look in my eye. Today was the day. Today I was ending it all....

...............................

The same potted plants laid either side of the doors, the same colours still adorned the walls, the same posters, the same seats, the same well thumbed magazines still laid on the small table in the middle of the room, awaiting a saliva slick finger to dog the corner of the pages.

Pushing my way to the desk, I laid my hand on the same cool blue work desk.

Then it came again...

The cobra that coiled itself around my vocal cords, the puncture in my lungs, the bees inside my skull, the extreme increase in heat, the shaking knees, sweaty palms and the thudding heart that quickened.

The receptionist waited, looking at me as I experienced my melt down, completely unaware of what was happening before her. Patience filled her eyes, but so did understanding.

"I--.." I struggled.

A tear built in the corner of my eye.

Then it all changed again. The scent of lemon coiled under my nose. My stomach flapped and my throat decided to join the clusterfuck and urge.

Clamping my hand over my mouth, I flew from the desk and into the restroom, falling into a cubicle, I emptied my stomach.

The offending smell came again, making my eyes scan the area and find the freshener. Seeing it sat on the wall, spraying its essence, I glared at it.

"Screw yo–"

Choking and spluttering, I threw breakfast up into the toilet bowl and snagged toilet roll to wipe my mouth.