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33. Vengeance :  The End
Robyn Fenty

 Vengeance :  The EndRobyn Fenty

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"You haven't said a word since morning, did you sleep well?"

I sat by the window sipping my cup of coffee while being greeted by the cool breeze. I stared out at the hole Zachary dug me up from, if he had waited just one more minute I know I wouldn't be alive right now. They thought he was gone but lucky for me he wasn't. He saw the entire thing and came to my rescue the second they left. I was completely shaken up by the incident, I knew it was coming but I was still in shock that he'd do something like that to me.

I remembered running into Zachary at the coffee house where he gave me the details about the first burial. It was obvious Sierra was gone but Quavo wasn't as he played a role in attempting to get rid of me. I should be in physical pain but I felt numb even though I was dug up my humanity is still down there somewhere. The rihbirth of the savage.

These past months, most of them beautiful, some brutal, I thought I earned his trust. I have never strayed, betrayed, abandoned... but been stalwart, true and loving. I have shown over and over that I would do anything in this world to keep him safe, yet still he saw the opposite. I thought he knew my heart. Now that it felt like he had torn my heart from my chest so all I felt was numbness .

He misread me and then felt bitter, angry, though all the while I was simply doing my best to love him. I'm not perfect I have made mistakes but he has crossed this line, he was way beyond it. My heart still beats, but against a chest that feels hollow. My eyes still see, yet the world that is so close around me seems far away. My mind feels as if it's about to shut down, unwilling to think anymore. Perhaps this is shock, I'm really not sure. All I know is that I poured in love, hoping it would've be reciprocated. I poured in love and threw away my entire life only to be ruined.

I told him repeatedly how much I loved him and that made me unlovable. I said that I cared and that made me the target of his hatred. I poured affection into his life and he attacked me over and over. So many times I stared into his gun but each time I made excuses for him, he's probably new at this, he never received loved like this before, he had a rough childhood, he shows his love differently, excuses excuses.

He left me to die a painful death, I am alive with insides contracting, cold. Is this trauma or am I in shock... I still don't know. The words of my father played in my head: "If in life your heart acts like a gun, the person you face is a monster." And he was right.

"Thank you" I finally responded to Zac abandoning my thoughts. My voice cracked as the words left my lips, it's the longest I've gone without talking. I heard my voice trail slowly, almost as it the words were unwilling to take flight. I looked at him and I could see the sadness in his eyes, the blue was too glossy. I didn't need the pity nor the sympathy.

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