The Life of Nikki Winston

Let's Go Get Tig

I met up with the guys in an empty lot. "They got Tig in a motel about two miles down the road. Four of 'em." I heard Jax sat to Clay as I stepped out of my truck.

"Who has Tig?" I asked, already angry.

"Bounty hunters." Kip answered me. Damn it, Trager. What mess have you gotten into now?

"So what are we gonna do about it?" I asked. I didn't know what I had unleashed, but in a few short sentences, Clay and Jax were pushing each other. While the guys separated them, I pushed my way in front of Jax and grabbed his face, bringing his eyes to catch mine. "You listen to me, Jackson Teller. I know we have a lot of problems right now, and I know that a lot of pressure is on you, but I need you to keep your head clear. You guys cannot be fighting right now. Tig's freedom is on the line. Whatever problems you two have, whatever problems we have between us, none of that matters right now. What matters is that we get Tig out of there and back home. He took a fall on the road, right? That means he needs medical attention and they're gonna give him the bare minimum. He won't get any real treatment until he's in custody and we can't have him in custody. Do you hear me? Are you paying attention? Blink if you're paying attention because what I'm about to say next is extremely important." I waited for a breath while he slowly blinked at me. "Good. All of you are my family, and I don't want to lose my creepy Uncle Tig because you and Clay are fighting. I love my family, and I refuse to watch one of them be carted away and stolen from me again. Do you understand? Put your squabbling to rest for now and convince Clay to get him now. I've already lost one of my best friends, don't let me lose one of my uncles too." I demanded, staring straight into his eyes like I could have wrestled his very soul into submission if I needed to, to get my point across. Jax looked away form me with guilt eating at his expression before he turned back to face Clay. Bobby suggested they take a walk or a smoke and Jax walked off towards the flatbed. In two seconds, I realized what was happening with him on the bed of the truck and my dad driving. I ran with Chibs and Kip as they hopped on the bed of the truck. just before my dad got too far away, Jax grabbed my hand and pulled  me up to join them. Happy climbed on right behind me and I latched onto him as I stepped away from Jax. "I guess this is the perfect time to talk to you, Happy, since you're stuck with me until after we get Tig. I wanted to know if you'd do some work on me like before. Got to add some more stuff to my collection." I yelled to him over the wind.

"'Course sweetheart. When we get back, I'll give you all the stuff you want to ad. Might take a whole night though." He offered.

"I don't care if it takes three night, as long as you're the one doing the work. I don't trust anyone else to touch me when it comes to my collection." I yelled back. The others were staring at us, mostly confused; Jax was glaring at Happy. What the hell is his problem now?

We got to the motel quickly, and I braced myself when I realized my dad was gonna back the flatbed into the wall of the building to get us inside. I pressed myself against the back of the cab, the guys kneeling in front of me while they armed themselves, and held on for dear life as we rammed into the motel room. The guys jumped in, aiming whatever they had at the bounty hunters. Happy and I jumped from the bed and freed Tig from the chair they had him tied to. As soon as he was able to get up, I pulled him onto the flatbed with me and sat with the guys as we drove away from the motel. "Jesus, that was kind of a rush. But don't you eve get kidnapped by fucking bounty hunters again, Tig. Next time, I'll be the one armed and they won't be the ones with threats of harm to their dicks. You got me?" I warned him.

"You got it, babe. Now take me home, I need a real doctor."

When we got back to the empty lot, Jax and Opie got into it as they were packing the bikes up to finished their run. "I'm tired of both of your bullshit. Have a good run, I'm gonna help dad and Tig get the bikes home. Don't do any more stupid shit, alright?" I broke in, giving my brother a hug before running off to get to my truck.

I got a call in the middle of the night that woke me from a nightmare. I thanked god for whoever had called me, then realized who it was after I answered. "Why are you calling me when you're getting wasted, Jax? We aren't that close anymore; we haven't been for a long time."

"This shit with me and Clay, it's getting out of hand; I know it is. But I don't know how to deal with it. The things I'm angry about, I have a right to be, but at the same time, I don't want it to ruin the club and tear us apart with me acting this way. I don't know what to do."

"I don't know what you want me to say, Jax. I still don't understand why you called me instead of Tara. You should be calling your Old Lady for things like this, that's what she signed up for. I'm just a member's sister, I'm not here for the benefits of the lifestyle of the club, and I'm not here as someone's therapist. I've tried so hard to reconcile what happened with us, Jax. But I don't know that we could ever be as close friends as we were before. And I want you to be happy Jax, but you can't keep giving me false hope like this: telling me I wouldn't be rebound pussy, calling me in the middle of the night for things you should be calling Tara for, glaring at a brother because I asked him to do some work on me. All that has to stop. I'm sorry, Jax. I want to help you, I really do. But I have to put myself before you and the club for once. I know you'll figure it out, you always do. I have faith in at least that part of you, J. I've got to go."

"Nikki, wait. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for using you like that. I'm sorry for blaming you the way I did. I'm sorry for pushing you for information. I'm sorry for treating you so awful. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I should have treated you better from the beginning, I shouldn't have done what I did. I'm so sorry, Nikki."

"I know you are, Jax. I know. But I can't keep doing this back and forth with you. One minute we might be okay to be friends, and then the next you act like you hate me or something. I can't keep it up anymore. I've got too much on my plate and I'm trying really hard not to love you like I do. I'm trying so hard to just be some girl who's related to the club. But I need you to stop making it harder on me. I can't be a part of your life like that, and I know that. I've known it for a long time now. But I need you to give me time to grieve for what I know I can't have and get over it. I can't do that with the way we are now."

"No, Nikki, please. Don't give up on me." I heard him swallow something down, probably whatever fifth of liquor he'd grabbed before he called me.

"I'm sorry, Jax. I really am. But I can't do that for you. I hoped for a long time that my faith in you would carry me through anything, but I just can't keep it up any longer. Look, call Tara. Talk to her about what's bugging you with Clay, because I'm sure you told her. I'll be there to see greet you guys when you get back from the charity run since I'm borrowing Happy from you. I'll see you guys when you get back. Give the others my love." I hung up after that, beyond the point of emotionally drained. I laid in my bed, waiting for tears that never came, and eventually passed out from exhaustion.

AN: The song is mainly for the last conversation between Jax and Nikki. Some of the lines just spoke to me for this scene.