coffee // joshler

47

tyler's point of view

being at work, though i love what i do, is not something i can say i enjoy when i teeter between littlespace and not all day.

im up front this morning, making drinks as ashley takes the orders. we work quickly, which is good, because we're busy again today.

when the rush slows down, she puts a hand on my shoulder. "tyler, are you okay?"

i bite my lip, trying to stay in the correct headspace to talk to her. "yeah," is all i manage.

"i don't think you are... why don't you switch with alex in the back?" she suggests, her eyebrows furrowed.

i dont answer out loud then, i just nod and walk to the kitchen. i see alex and jenna working on a batch of cookies.

"alex, c-can you trade with me?" i swallow and shove my hands in my pockets.

"sure," he wipes his hands on his apron. i can tell in his face that he wants to ask what's going on, but im grateful when he doesn't push it.

once he's gone, i wash my hands and then go to stand next to jenna, picking up where alex had left off.

"uh, tyler?" jenna is lining up balls of cookie dough on a tray, and i can tell by her tone that even though alex didn't ask, she will. "are you okay?"

"fine," i mumble, mixing some chocolate chips into the bowl. "'m fine."

"you're acting different," she pauses what shes doing and wipes her hands on her apron. she heads toward the other side of the room, where the phone is. "ill call brendon in. you go home and get some rest. we can hold down the fort," she reassures me, a small smile on her face as she picks up the phone and proceeds to dial brendon's number.

i wipe my hands on my apron and then take it off, hanging it on the hook and then pulling on my coat. i clock out and thank jenna quietly before i clock out and then leave the store. i do my best to age myself up before i drive myself home, but i slip back into my younger headspace as soon as i step inside the building.

josh is already there when i arrive, laying in bed with his laptop.

i immediately collapse onto the mattress then, absolutely exhausted from being on edge for so long.

"youre home early," josh points out, slightly confused. "are you okay?" he closes his computer and looks down at me with a soft smile.

"small," i mumble, pulling the blanket up to my chin. "small and sleepy. wanna cuddle with you."

"well, how could i say no when you're so cute?" he replies, slipping off his shoes and laying down next to me, wrapping his arms around my torso and pulling the blanket over himself. "i love you."

"love you too, daddy," i nuzzle into his chest and fall asleep in minutes, thankful to be able to finally relax.

when i wake up from my nap, daddy is still laying beside me, typing something on his laptop. its probably for work.

"i sorry you have to do work, daddy," i yawn and curl up closer to him, laying my head on his shoulder. "work is yucky."

"well, don't worry about me, my prince," he kisses the top of my head. "how was your nap?"

"good. i kinda hungry now though," i tell him, hoping he'll get the hint. just in case he doesn't, i open my mouth and talk again. "can you get me some foods?"

he laughs a little and closes his computer. "i can get you some foods, hun. let's go see what we can find in the kitchen, yeah?"

we don't find anything. well, we do, but its all lame-o food.

"daddy, lets order pizza," i tug on his sleeve and pout my bottom lip, "pretty please can we get pizza?"

he smiles at my expression and nods. "sure we can, love."

daddy orders the pizza over the phone while i pick a tv show for us to watch.

josh sits next to me, and jim sits in my lap.

we spend the rest of the night like that, talking and laughing, cuddling and watching cartoons.

-

when i wake up the next morning, jim is the only one next to me in bed. a note sits on the bedside table and i pick it up to read it.

tyler,

went to work. cafe is closed today so enjoy yourself! relax. ill be home as soon as i can.

love you,

j

i smile at the small piece of paper and fold it up, leaving it on the table. i get out of bed and realize im still in my clothes from last night. i strip them off and replace the ensemble with sweatpants and one of josh's t-shirts.

i sit on the couch with our puppy, coloring a picture and watching a christmas movie. the movie has a kind of scary part, but jim protects me. once i finish up my picture, i tape it to the wall and then smile at my work.

i lounge around for the rest of the day with jim, remaining in littlespace for most of the time. however, im feeling a bit bratty today, and i want daddy home now. not after work.

i pull my phone out and type a text message for him.

from tyler: daddy come home >:(

he answers not long after i press send.

from josh: im at work sweetie. ill be home as soon as i can.

from tyler: no!!!! nooooow!!!!

from josh: i cant leave work yet. im sorry :( i wish i could.

from tyler: angry >:(

from josh: please dont be upset baby. i cant help that i have to work. :( i love you.

from tyler: nu uh baby ty angry at daddy >:(

he texts something back, but i don't answer. hes not here to tell me what i can or cant do, so i decide to do the one thing i know he'll hate most.

i make a mess.

i rip out coloring sheets, i take a pack of crackers and eat them all before i drop the trash onto the floor. i tip over the hamper in our bedroom and walked around with jim close behind.

i make as big a mess as i feel necessary for him to understand just how angry i am that he isn't home with me right now.

this will show him.

(an: omg tyler chill...)