It All Started In Rehab ✓

[Chapter Sixty] Leaving Rehab

Chapter Sixty — Leaving Rehab
Bailey's Pov

Today was the day. I had been packing and people even threw me a mini going away party, I promise to stay in touch with some people that I bonded with in group and then the next morning I couldn't sleep because I was too excited to leave.

I didn't think I would be excited to go, I thought I would be freaking out and nervous and begging to stay but I felt ready after my talk with Robert. I had too many things to stay positive and sober for. I knew I wouldn't always feel as happy and positive as I was now but if I could remember this feeling when things got hard, know that I could feel it again I think it would help.

This was what was next, I think I reached as far as I could go in here and I was ready to move on with my life, Julian's letter to me helped too, I didn't want to life in the past.

I knew I would struggle with it, I knew I would crave Heroin, I knew I would want a drink, I knew I would miss Lacey but I also knew that it was time to start moving on, Lacey would be pissed at me right now if she saw me holding myself back over her, she would stand and lecture and probably yell and tell me to stop being miserable and to live my life.

I knew what I wanted to do to but I just didn't know if Julian would take it well.

I hummed as I listened to the songs he left me on the CD's and maybe even danced around my room a little bit.

Drew had already called to wish me good luck and he said he couldn't wait to be here to see me, they were almost done with the season and then they would be working on heading over here, early December I was told.

It was starting to get cold here which meant my tank tops and shorts weren't going to cut it anymore, I wasn't used to that, I forgot that the world keeps on spinning out there and that I would actually need to prepare for weather.

I took my final shower here and I spent a lot of time just sitting in the bathroom remembering her, I looked at the spot she had died and I felt the tears come, this was the only reason I would be sad to leave here.

All the memories I had with her were in this room, in this place. I would leave and I wouldn't have any of her out there like I was supposed to.

I guess even though I saw her body and was at her funeral this was the last step into accepting her death, leaving and her not being there, I tried to convince myself, much like Julian tried, that she had just left like she was supposed to and now I know that she really was gone.

"Hey Bailey." Lacey's parents came in to pack the rest of their stuff and they looked terrible, they left enough of it to make it look homier for me, and I thanked them for that. They didn't just take it all and make the whole place bare.

"Hey." I tried to smile as they started packing her stuff while I did mine.

"We thought there would be some things you would like to have of hers." Her mom handed me a box, there were pictures of her, some CD's, her IPod, letters, drawings, and a couple notebooks. "I know it's not much but I figured you would want at least a picture of her to remember what she looked like." Her mom wiped some tears and I gave her a hug.

"Thank you, what are there?" I picked up the notebooks

"Sketch pads and her journal, we read it and think that when you're ready you may like to, it may explain a lot of things and she wrote a suicide letter for you and Julian, we didn't read those."

"She wrote us a letter?" I asked getting choked up and she nodded

"Thank you, thank you guys for what you've done in considering me when you guys lost a daughter." I put the box with my stuff and she nodded