I went home and cried a lot that night. What hurt the most was the thought that Jeffrey saw me as that person who I'd never be. That person is the kind of person I'd stayed away from all my life. We were doing so well, everything was so great and smooth between us and then BAM, a punch in the face. I was happy that I had Alicia, although it was only through the phone; I needed her and she was there for me just like I was there for her when she needed me.
Fuck, I was so angry at him for not trying to believe what I was saying, for assuming things before thinking. I would never hurt him on purpose, I would never be with him if I was in love with someone else. Andrew was charming, but I didn't have anything close to romantic feelings towards him; he was just a person who played one of my favorite characters in a TV show, who later on turned out to be a friend. Just a friend.
Now it was two days later and I was at the gym, music in my ears, the world around me blocked for the moment. The gym was my second home, the place where I would go to not only to get stronger, but to let out stress, sadness and anger.
After a sweaty session, I went home and baked my usual peanut butter cookies before I sat and corrected essays. I was happy it was a busy period at school because teaching would help me concentrate only on that and not on the man who hurt me.
✧
''Chris, could you please wait one minute?'' I asked my student as I smiled warmly. Chris sat down in front of me and swallowed nothing, obviously nervous. ''I just wanted to say that your writing skills have gotten much better. Keep up the good work, will you? I'm really happy with how your latest essay turned out. Good job, Chris''.
''Really? Thank you so much, miss Alton. I will keep up the good work, I promise'' He answered as he got up. ''May I go now?'' he asked and I nodded my head. ''Oh and tell mr. Morgan I said hi''. Oh for fuck's sake. My students, just like everyone else, knew that Jeffrey and I were a couple. I nodded again and dismissed him, knowing I wasn't going to say hi to mr. Morgan. Would I ever again? Fuck.
I was preparing my material for my next English lesson when my phone started ringing, Katie's name big on the screen. I smiled as I felt that besides Alicia, there was someone who actually wanted to talk to me, someone who had turned out to be a friend.
''Hey, can you talk?'' Katie said at the other end.
''I've got ten minutes before the lesson starts. Is everything alright?''.
''Yes, yes. I was just wondering if you wanted to get dinner with me and David tonight?'' David was our co-worker. ''Gotta take you out, make you do something else other than home and gym'' she laughed a bit and I did too.
''You're right. That's all I've done all week. I need distraction'' I replied honestly. She knew about Jeffrey and I because she had kept asking me what was wrong with me at work, why I always looked down. ''When and where?'' I asked.
''You know that cute Italian place a few blocks away from your place?''.
''Yes, good choice'' I was getting hungry just at the thought of how good it always smelled when I passed by that restaurant.
''8 pm?'' she asked.
''It's a plan! See you then'' I hung up and waited for my students to fill the class for my last English lesson for the day.
✧
As I looked through my closet to find something to wear, I found the leather gloves that Jeffrey gave me when we met. I thought I had given them back; maybe I just dreamed about it or something. I laid down on my bed and closed my eyes, remembering that day at the park when we talked about everything and nothing. I remembered how I couldn't stop looking at his dimples every time he smiled or laughed. God damn it, it had only been almost three days since we fought, but it felt so much longer - probably because we never texted or spoke once during these days. But oh, I was still so angry yet I missed his voice so insanely much. Although I was so bitter about this, I still checked my phone all the time to see if he'd call or text.
Finally getting my shit together, I put on some make up, got ready and went to meet Katie and David.
''Aren't you a hottie?'' Katie exclaimed as she hugged me.
''Aren't you a liar?'' I said, rolling my eyes. I hugged David and then went in to devour the whole restaurant. My stomach was going insane from hunger.
We ate and talked and had a laugh; yeah, I actually had a good evening, where I could forget about Jeffrey for a while. The food was delicious and the company amazing and it felt good to have someone to hang out with. Maybe, just maybe, I could deal with being without Jeffrey. Though I didn't think I wanted to.
After we said our goodbyes I checked my phone to see I had five missed calls from Jeffrey. Woah. At least I knew I didn't miss them on purpose; I just never heard them or checked my phone - the company was that good. I decided to wait to see if he'd call again and then maybe answer, but I wasn't going to call him back. Maybe tomorrow.
Five minutes later I was on my street and right when I thought nothing more would happen tonight, I looked from my phone to my entrance door and my heart stopped.
''Jeffrey''.
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