The counselor(Ariana/you)

Chapter sixty two

Love, it's such a beautiful word isn't it, a noun that means an intense deep affection towards someone. Love is probably one of the most abused words in the dictionary because you see the word "love" only contains four letters but it has millions and millions of different meanings and contains the most power above all other words. Some people are afraid to even let the word Love swim from the back of their tongue to the tip and let it dive off into the unknown world because they're simply afraid of showing affection that can be either they're afraid to let down the walls they have built from all the traumatizing moments they have been through because building them walls is just as painful as watching them fall down unable to do anything about it.

You see everyone has a wall if it's the size the the fence outside your backyard or the size of a high rise building in the middle of New York, these walls were made because we are all afraid of that five lettered word called the Truth.

The truth can be ugly sometimes wait no the truth is always ugly because it shows what a person is capable of doing to you in a way that can hurt you but we need the truth because even though it brings out the worst in people we finally get to see a side to them that you've never seen it's the dark side, the side of a person that is broken beyond repair but even as kids we all liked to pretend to be someone or something that we're not and we place that someone or something in front of our wall that we spend every insomniac night building because letting someone even glance at that wall because they know it's there they're able to rip it down brick by brick and leave you there with the wreckage and scars that is gonna make you build your wall even fifty times bigger than it was before and the next person that comes along that is probably the one for you probably the only person that will treat you how you should be treated, you push them away because you're tired of playing an act that isn't selling many tickets so you give you that four lettered word called Love that you had so much hope in that you thought could fix you one day becomes a word in a foreign language that you'll never bother to understand.

Truth, contains five letters is also a noun means the quality or state of being true is also a powerful word but unlike Love you'll never push Truth away because when you leave Love you pack Truth with you like a newborn puppy, you don't leave it alone you handle it with such gentleness because unlike Love you'll never stop believing in Truth.

I remember that day clearly the day when I finally learned the truth.

Ariana rolled over pressing both of our naked bodies together 'good morning y/n/n' 'morning' I said turning around to face Ariana.

'How did you sleep' she said curling a strand of my hair around her finger 'like a baby for once' I chuckled 'I must've worn you out' she then chuckled.

We stared at each other for a moment Ariana me letting my eyes look into Arianas her listening to what my eyes were telling her.

'What's wrong' she looked at me concerned whenever she looked at me like this it would make me feel like another one of her damaged patients 'don't look at me like that' I sat up off the bed going over to her dresser to put on a pair of shorts and a top while she sat up in the bed looking at me with the sheets covering herself 'looking at you like what' she asked 'like I'm just one of your patients Ariana I've told you this before' I muttered turning back around to her.

She put her arm out to me 'come on come back to bed' 'Ariana' I sighed she then looked at me confused 'we still need to talk' that sentence made her roll her eyes and fall back onto the bed 'you know y/n sometimes things don't need talking about' 'and then sometimes there are thing that need an explanation Ariana maybe I wouldn't be asking to talk about anything with you if you didn't freak out and run off to New York' I said making her sit back up abruptly in the bed.

'I had every right to freak out y/n your friend caught us in my office what was I supposed to do wait around and hope for the best you would've done the same thing if you were in my situation' 'you could've at least picked up the phone once Ariana it's not that hard' 'I was scared y/n' 'So was I Ariana I lost two of the people that mean the most to me the second Camila walked into that office and I also lost myself Ariana do I mean that little to you that you couldn't even tell me that you were in New York' 'who do you think told Frankie to tell you where I was' 'why did you wait so long why couldn't you tell me yourself I knew you were listening to the voicemails I was leaving on your phone' 'look y/n' she started of gently 'we're together now that's all that matters' she held my left hand in both of her hands as she was sitting up on the side of the bed.

'No it's not' I pulled my hand away from here 'I got myself signed into a mental hospital because of you leaving me as if I meant nothing to you' 'y-' 'let me finish' I cut her off letting a breath of air out 'you know one of my biggest problems is that when I'm lost Ariana I don't look for myself instead I look for you so can you only imagine what it was like when I couldn't find you when I didn't even know why you left' Ariana stayed silent 'but you know I learned something from it all' 'what was that' she said softly 'that you can pack up and leave me without thinking twice about it' this made her get up off the bed holding the sheets to her body still.

'You know that's not true y/n' 'then explain why you never answered your phone why didn't you even bother to contact me' 'because y/n I have my own shit to deal with as well you're not the only person with problems in the world I needed time to get myself together and I was scared that I was going to loose you so instead I thought it was better to leave you' 'why didn't you just tell me that Ariana how come I tell you a lot and you can't tell me anything I mean do you not trust me or something' 'no I do trust you y/n/n it's just I have my own way of dealing with things I tend to push anyone that cares about me away cause I'm afraid that I'm not good enough for them or they're gonna hurt me this' she motioned between her and I 'I haven't had this ever and I just don't know how to deal with it if you know what I mean I guess I just never had someone that cared for me or that depended on me as much as you do' 'well I think I need to depend on you a little less it's not really that healthy and I'm sorry for putting that pressure on you' 'don't be y/n'.

I sat down on the bed Ariana following in suit grabbing my hand once again 'y/n look at me' she used her other hand to move my head to look at her 'stay in New York with me' 'what' I furrowed my eyebrows 'we can't Ariana' 'yes we can you told me that you and Madison broke out of that place you were in so the second they find you both of you will be shoved back in there stay with me even for just a month and then if you still want to go back I'll go back with you y/n please this can be a little fresh start for the both of us it will do us good'

'I'll stay'

It's sad to think that this book is ending soon 🤧
Anyways hope you have/had a great day.