𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞 𝙖𝙢 [𝗻𝗼𝗮𝗵 𝘀𝗰𝗵𝗻𝗮𝗽𝗽] ✓

Nineteen

i'm so tired... - lauv & troye sivan 

millie pov

"i'm bored." i deadpan. me and y/n decided to go see a movie, but so far it's the most excruciating thing i've had to do the entire time we've been in atlanta. like i'm not kidding, it's an eye sore. 

"oh my gosh, same." y/n replies with a humorless laugh. we stand up and make our way out of the theatre quietly. 

"that was literally the worst movie ever." y/n says as soon as we get outside. we both start laughing to the point of tears about how bad it was. when we sober up we ride back the hotel, deciding to go to the pool.

***** 

"i could lay here, forever." y/n says with a satisfied sigh. we're both lounging by the pool, it's one of the first warm days here. it's so nice. we've been her for about and hour and all we've done is relax. i've been so stressed lately with all the filming that i forgot how it was to not have to worry about everything.

"hey guys." sadie says as she takes the chair next to me. apparently her filming schedule was switched around and she was off for the day, or at least that's what i last heard. it's hard to keep up with everyone's schedule when you can't even keep up with your own. clouds begin to shade our sun and they don't seem so friendly. 

"RUN!" y/n yells and everyone at the pools shoots out of their spots and to the overhang. we all watch as the rain begins to fall from the sky, hard.

"so much for a nice day of relaxing by the pool." i say as we all stalk off back into the hotel. it's been one rollercoaster of weather here, it's can't seem to make up it's mind! we go to our own hotel rooms and as soon as i get to mine, i'm fast asleep.

*****

y/n pov

i wake up to the sound of my alarm going off. 

"wake up sleepyhead." noah whispers into my hair, and that's when i realize that i must've slept the rest of the day yesterday. i climb out of bed and walk to the bathroom yawning. i turn the light and fan on as i strip and step into the shower.

the hot water trickles down my back, causing me to not want to leave. i once heard a quote that said if you still think about it in the shower, that you're not over it. pretty accurate. i look down and see my ribs poking out one by one. i pour shampoo onto my hair and rinse.

i step out, refreshed. now time for the worst part of my day. body check. i look in the mirror, it must be lying. i see a girl with extremely defined collar and hip bones and ribs. her face looks sunken in and her eyes are hallow. this can't be me. 

the real me has a bulging stomach, thighs the size of a whale and no collar bones. the mirror's broke. i pull a towel around my body and unlock the door to go get some clothes. i pick out a pair of black jeans and a baggy army green t-shirt. i change in the bathroom and finish getting ready.

"breakfast?" noah asks.

"no time, sorry." i say, grabbing the keys off the counter and my bag.

"not so fast." he stops me, "you've barely eaten anything the past couple days." he says, eyebrows furrowed.

"yes i have, you've just been to busy all week. don't worry about me noah, i'm perfectly healthy."

"okay." he says letting my arm go. "wait." he says.

"yes?" 

"be back earlier tonight, i've got something planned." he smiles. i smile in return and practically skip into the hallway. just a little too fast, my legs are wobbling. i stop and take a deep breath, walking a little more slowly this time.

"hey, y/n!" finn says as he leaves his room.

"hey finn." i say smiling. he runs up and we start to talk about the upcoming episode that we're filming today.

*****