- you showed Me love when I wasn't feeling it-
Jahseh Onfroy
I sat in the shower as the water ran down my naked frame, washing away the soap suds, but leaving the dirty feeling with me.
Leaving my head under water. I feel lost, faded. What has happened to Sanity and human nature. Humans are their own enemy, bringing down one another for their own benefits.
There's no reason to still hang on, other than the baby. If its mine. That's probably the only thing keeping me going right now.
Thinking that I have to stay strong because my baby would need a father. Put the rain is falling down harder than ever. This storm inside of me, it's not the same as before.
It's worse, more intense. More strong. Painful, almost. I looked down at my slim body, seeing bruises from last night, I don't even remember him hitting me but apparently he did.
"Jahseh?" I heard Stokeley call out to me. "Are you okay?" He asked from the other side of the bathroom door.
"Y-Yeah," I replied numbly. Not even paying attention to how red my skin was turning due to the scorching hot temperature of the water.
"You've been in the shower for two hours," he said. I didn't even notice. Because when you're stuck in thought, time passes before you like magic. Well maybe a curse.
"Oh," I number and turned the knobs off to the shower. Once the water was cut completely off, I stepped out of the shower after wrapping a towel around my waist. I grabbed another one and dried off my upper body and hair.
I turned to face the wall where the shower rack was at, instead of looking in the mirror. I couldn't take seeing myself right now. I'm disgusted and dismissed.
I just pray one day something good will come from all this hurt.
I pulled on my boxers before my grey sweatpants and one of Stokeleys hoodies. I dropped the two towels I used into the laundry hamper and then opened the bathroom door, walking out slowly and making my way to the bed. I sat down and brought my knees up to my chest while Stokeley watched me in full concentration.
"Come here," he opened his arms, inviting me to a hug. I moved into his arms and melted into his embrace, feeling a twinge of safety and relief while in his arms.
"I'll protect you," he told me.
I nodded my head.
"Get some sleep, tomorrow is a big day," he rubbed my back.
I nodded my head and wrapped myself around his body as we laid down, finding sleep in our reality.
Y'all ain't ready for the amount of tea and drama awaiting you.
Like the things that happen are gonna have you up thinking for some time!!
Sksksks
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