Find Me Later, Brock

Lucky To Have Her

Brennen drove me back to the house and we kissed goodbye in the car before I got out and waved as he left.
I walked through the front door and headed to my room. I wanted to shower and change into different clothes before Colby and I talked.
As I was headed to the bathroom, I passed Sam and he stopped me with a hug.
"Hey, how was your first time at Disneyland?"
"I had a lot of fun. The whole house should go together. I think it'd be fun."
"That's a great idea actually. We should plan that soon."
"Hey if you see Colby, let him know I'm going to be a minute. I just want to freshen up before we have this dreaded conversation."
Sam crosses his arms and sighs.
"Rory, I wanted to apologize too."
"Why? You didn't do anything wrong."
"Well, I didn't talk to you as much as I should have. I should have been a better friend through those four years and I think both Colby and I recognize that we weren't great friends to you."
I tear up and nod my head before going to hug him.
"Thank you, Sam. I know I was really salty whenever you would call and I want to say I'm sorry for acting that way."
He pats my back and I pull back to see his face.
"It's okay, Rory. You'll always be my favorite girl to explore with. We're family, sometimes a family fights, but in the end we make up. That's why when you talk to Colby, don't push him away even if you want to. Because our explore family isn't right if you and him aren't friends."
I sigh.
"I'll try, Sam. For you."
"No, don't do it for me. Do it for you."
After I showered and got dressed, I went downstairs to look for Colby.
***
Colby's P.O.V.~
Sam told me that Rory was ready to talk to me and I was extremely nervous. I hoped that she'd accept my apology but I knew that there was a possibility that she wouldn't. I found myself trying to rehearse what I wanted to say but none of it was coming out right. I looked at myself in the mirror and tried to give myself a pep talk and by then I figured she was done getting ready.
My hands shook as I made my way downstairs and when I went to the kitchen, Kat and Rory were talking, but as soon as they both saw me they stopped talking.
"Imma go, let's talk later though." Kat said before walking passed me with a look that basically said, don't fuck this up.
I walked over to Rory and she took a deep breath. I couldn't help but notice that she looked absolutely beautiful. Her hair was braided to the side and she wore no makeup. There's not one girl like Rory that I've met and I knew that even if we never ended up together, there would always be part of me that would always love her and her spirit.
"Hi." I said and she crossed her arms looking at the floor.
"Hi."
"Do you want to go talk in private like, at a park or something."
She looked at me and nodded.
"I actually was thinking it would be nice to go for a walk. If you don't want to though we can just go sit somewhere."
I smiled and nodded.
"No, a walk sounds good."
"Okay, let's go then."
We walked towards the front door and she walked out the door as I held it open.
Once outside the gate of the house, we walked side by side down the sidewalk.
"So," I said and she shrugged.
"So." She replied and I took a breath.
"Well, I guess the first thing I want to do is talk about why I didn't call."
She stayed quiet and I cleared my throat.
"Listen, Rory. When I left you that day after the kiss, after everything, I was going to call. But when we got here, I began to second guess my actions and I knew that yes, I had feelings for you but I didn't know how to properly have that conversation with you over the phone. I beat myself up for weeks for not talking to you like a man and wished that I had talked to you a year prior to everything, because that's when I had started to feel a certain way about you. Instead, I fucked up. I waited too long and then I was leaving with Sam and I didn't feel right not talking about everything with you in person."
"I understand that, Colby. I guess the thing that bothers me is that you could have called and said just that and then we could have still talked. You didn't even try to call or text me at all for four whole years."
"I know that, that would've been the mature and best way to handle it all but I was scared."
"Scared of what?"
I knew the answer. I knew the real answer and it was terrifying to know I had to say it to her but this was the best time to be one-hundred with her. No bullshit, no walking on eggshells, I just had to be truthful.
"I was scared that I would allow myself to fall further in love with a girl I knew I would probably lose to someone else, who I wouldn't be with everyday, and who I knew deserved more than I could ever give."
She stops in her tracks and I turn to look at her. Her eyes were welling up with tears and I went to grab her hand but she stepped back and I raised my hands up.
"Sorry." I said and she nodded.
"It's okay. That's just uh, a lot."
I smile and run a hand through my hair.
"Trust me, I know."
"So, you didn't call because you were already in love with me and you didn't want to get hurt more?" She asked and I nodded.
"But instead you just thought it would be easier to hurt me instead." She says and I immediately shake my head.
"I know I hurt you. I know I put you through a lot of pain and confusion. But I thought- I thought that if you could find someone else, that you'd, I don't know... forget about me and forget about how I hurt you."
"I could never forget about you, Colby. You were such a big part of my life after my mom died. You were the first person to comfort me, even at such a young age. Whenever I needed you, you were there. You were the person who I could tell anything and everything to. You and Sam both. That's why when I didn't hear from you, I just felt like everything that we had been through together just didn't matter after you kissed me."
She stepped closer to me and looked at me in the eyes.
"I thought that you were somehow disgusted by me or something."
"Aurora, I think you are the most beautiful women in the entire world. You are beautiful in ways that no other girl I've been with have or ever will be. You are so kind, smart, wise, reliable, caring, and your not afraid to make mistakes. You get gritty, you're a fighter and you are stronger than half the guys I know. You take every opportunity you have to become an even better person. There is no way I could be disgusted by you. If anyone should be disgusted here it should be you, at me."
She smiles a bit and looks at the ground.
"Listen, I want nothing more than for you to forgive me; and I know that things might not ever be the same. I also don't expect you to forgive me, but I want you to know that I'm so unbelievably sorry. I was such an asshole and I know that I didn't do what I should have, which was to be your friend and to also be honest with you."
Rory looks at me and part of me thinks that she's going to forgive me and the other half makes me think that she'll flip me off and walk away. my heart races as I wait for her reaction.
"Colby, it's definitely going to take some time for things to be normal again, but I do appreciate everything you said and I do accept your apology." She says and I can't help but want to hug her.
"I'm happy to hear that. I uh, I wish I could have done everything differently and I'm sorry I wasn't there when you probably needed me but I swear, I'll never let you down again."
She steps towards me and opens her arms out for me.
I hug her and it feels like when you find a twenty dollar bill on the street.
"I'm so lucky to have you in my life." I say and Rory just stays quiet until I step back.
"Hey, if you want to be awesome, you can also buy me some lunch." She says with a smile and I pat my stomach.
"I could make that happen. Whatever you want."
"I'm thinking Italian or sushi."
After lunch, we walk back into the house and everyone is there, looking at us with eyes wide.
"Hey!" Rory says walking towards them all.
"Well you're in a good mood. That's a good thing right?" Corey said to her and she looks back at me with a smile.
"Well I got a bomb ass meal and my friend back, so I'd say it's good."
"Thank god," Sam says standing up. "I say this deserves a trip to Disneyland. The whole house."
"Oh my god, Sam I was just there!" Rory says with a laugh and Sam claps his hands.
"Yeah, and it's a happiest place on earth! You know besides all the death and horror. So let's go!"
I walk up next to Rory and I shrug.
"I mean, it sounds pretty fun to me."
"Let's do it." Aaron says standing up.
"Okay. Let's do it then." Rory says smiling up at me.
I was happy that she seemed genuinely happy. I had my Rory back but the only problem was that she wasn't mine.
I was happy that she was at least with Brennen, but at the same time that's what made me upset because I had told him how in love with Rory I was and now he was the one who got to be with her.
I reminded myself that as long as she was happy that I would be happy too. I just knew I would be happier with her.