Chapter 28: Back

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"Some days I wish I could go back in life...Not to change anything, but to feel a few things twice."
               -Anonymous

                                                                                          

Can we just go back?

Can we go back to a time when things were simple? Back to a time when you loved your siblings and parents. A time when our lives were so much simpler. A time before we discovered what love was...or the crazy things it makes us do...

Can we go back to a time when we didn't get our hearts broken by people we loved...people who we thought loved us..

Do you think that if we could go back, it would make things better? Do you think that if we could just go back to the time when we didn't have to worry about our hearts getting broken...that we could be happy...that we could stop building up all these walls around us.

Do you think that if we never experienced that first heartbreak...that we would be happier-better?

The answer seems so simple.

We always want to go back in time and relive the days of our younger selves...we always want to take back our stupid mistakes...we always want to go back and never get our hearts broken by people we trusted..

Some of us wish to go back, simply to be happy...while others wish to go and speak with their younger selves, tell them what's going to come their way...what pain they'll feel...

But...We shouldn't allow ourselves to think like that..

Yes...our hearts were broken..our trust was stomped upon and our lives were torn apart by people that we thought would always be there...but that's life, isn't it?

Being betrayed-Being hurt...It's all a part of us...It's what makes us who we are..

Every single heartbreak that we face becomes a stroke of paint on our canvass, every tear we shed adds color and eventually... eventually the two come together to create a beautiful picture of maturity and learning.

For every late-night cry, every broken promise it helps us to grow...We grow and grow. We take the rain, we take the storm. We go day by day taking every single flash of lightening and roll of thunder...until one day...we meet the person who finally offers us an umbrella.

And when we meet that person-god-when we meet the person...All of those heartbreaks in the past...all those lonely nights...they don't even matter anymore. And why should they?

Heartbreak only lasts for so long.

And when you finally find a real love, you should never let go of it. Never.

Which is why you released Kim Seokjin.

Because you loved him.

And the sad thing is..you only realized it when you almost lost him.

A soft groan poured past your lips as your blue eyes slowly fluttered open, your head pounding painfully.

What happened?

You hesitantly raised your hand to your head, cradling it in an attempt to stop the throbbing pain as you slowly sat up from your laying position.

"Y/n?"

Your eyes snapped open at the familiar sound of your name, your gaze travelling to the other side of the room.

Hoseok stared at you with worried eyes, his gaze soft and full of pity as he watched you try to stand.

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