Saved (Adopted by Brendon Urie)

#38

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Brendon's POV

I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do. My daughter had relapsed and completely shut down. I feel my breathing quicken. I try some of my breathing techniques to calm down but it wasn't working too well.
"Brendon? It'll be ok take a breath in and out" Pete says sitting in front of me. I follow his breathing for a little while until I calm down.

I look up and see we are all a mess. Gerard looked ready to cry, Tyler was pacing up and down the room and Pete was trying to hold everyone together.
"I'm going to tell Sarah"

I get up and walk to my sleeping wife.
"Sarah?"
She slowly wakes up and looks at me with her beautiful eyes.
"Why are you up so early?"
"Sorry I didn't mean to wake you, but I thought it be best to tell you"
I explain to her what happened with Anna.
"She's asleep now thanks to Pete"
Sarah has tears in her eyes. I hug her.
"It'll be ok" I whisper.
"You can go back to sleep if you want" I tell her.
She nods and lays back down.

On my way back to the others, I look into where Anna was sleeping. She looked so peaceful but only for a second. She started becoming restless and twitching in her sleep.
I walk over and shake her.
"Anna? Wake up. It's just a dream"

She bolts up out of bed and looks at me with sleep deprived eyes. She buries her head in my chest and shakily takes a few breaths.
"There you go you're ok. You've got this." I tell her, patting down her hair.

"Why don't you go have a shower?" I ask after a while. She nods and finds her clothes and makes her way to the bathroom. I hear the shower turn on and I sit back on the couch.
"I'm going to get coffee. Do you guys want some?" Gerard says after looking at the clock. It was 6:12 and we had a plane to catch at 1pm. We all nod our head in agreement so he gets up and walks out of the room.

We sit in silence for a while, none of us knew what to say, none of us knew how to help her. My wife comes into the living room soon after and I hear the shower turn off. Sarah sits next to me on the couch and I hug her. Anna comes out of the bathroom, gives us a half, small, sad smile and goes back to her room.
"What do we do?" Sarah asks quietly.
"I don't know. It's killing me that she hurts this much." I say honestly.

Anna's POV

Dad suggested that I should take a shower which I accepted. I step into the shower and let the hot water hit my back. I don't know why I couldn't speak, all my thoughts and voices were consuming me and I was stuck in my head. Every time I wanted to speak voices would say things like. "They don't care" "You deserve to be silenced." Heck, even my biological mother's voice was stuck in my head. "You are worthless" and those are the nice things they say.

I knew I was hurting dad, I knew I was hurting Pete, Gerard and Tyler. And when mum found out I knew I would be hurting her.

I step out of the bathroom. I really wanted to cut but I knew that I shouldn't and besides, Gerard got rid of my blade. Walking back to my room I see Tyler, Dad, Pete and Mum. Mum looked ready to cry.
Where was Gerard?
He left you. He's sick of you.
No he's not
Then where is he?
He's probably gone to get coffee or something, they've been up all night
yeah because of you
Shut up already
Why
I'm sick of you controlling me
I'm not controlling you, I'm helping you
How are you helping me? You've made me stop talking to everyone.
Because I know deep down they all hate you

I have this conversation in my head all the way back to my room after giving everyone a half smile. I had no energy and that's all I could manage. I sit on the end of my bed and plug my headphones in and play music loud in my ears to drown out the voices. It sort of helped but not really. Not as well as it usually does.