Frozen Past

1

Olivia's P.O.V.

„Jack? What shall I do?" My legs shivered crazily, my heart raced from fear and the ice beneath me broke more and more.
     „Everything's going to be fine. I promise." Said my big brother. I wish I were as persuaded as he was.
     Slowly he walked towards me. I had so much fear, I didn't even know in which category I should put it. Was I more afraid of his life or of mine?
But when he took his walking stick, everything happened so fast: with the curve at the end of his stick he grabbed me and hurled me away from the breaking ice. I could hear him laugh; he was happy that he has saved me. I looked at him, smiling, and so, I didn't notice how the ice floe underneath him broke into pieces – I could've saved him if I would've kept more attention – and he fell into the ice-cold water.
     „Jack!" I screamed. I wanted to run to him and drag him out of the water, but my body didn't listen to me. Like being rooted to the spot, I sit there alone and was trying to find out what exactly happened right now. I waited in hope that I would soon wake up out of this horrible nightmare.
     So I sat there, after what seemed like to last an eternity and didn't notice how much I was already freezing. The evening was very close and I found myself back to reality, after I realized that no wonder would happen. I should go home, otherwise I could die too and the sacrifice of my brother would've been useless. My body felt so heavy, as if I was carrying two horses. Still, I managed to walk on, somehow.
Like in routine, I walked the path back home. My look was empty. I didn't know how much it took me until I found my home. Every second felt like an hour, every step tried to tell me in my head that I'm going in circles.
     I only remembered how I fell my parents into their arms, with a wet face because of my non-stopping tears.
    „Where is Jack?" They asked a lot, completely worried.
I didn't have the strength to answer them. Even if, it would've been probably soundless.

With a deep breath I opened my eyes and sat up straightened. My eyes burned like fire; I know, I cried again.
    „Another nightmare?" A young man walked to my bed and sat down beside me. I only nodded because if I opened my mouth, I would've begun to cry again.
    It already has been 15 years since the death of my brother, but the scenery is still hunting me in my nightmares.

               Flashback

After I told my parents what happened, we moved away. Away from the village, deeper into the forest. It still didn't keep me away from going back to see if Jack is alive and everything was just a bad dream.
     Never.
     Never was I lucky.
     After my parents found that out, we moved further away.
     And again.
     And one more time.
     My parents were very persuaded, that, if we keep moving away, we could then start a new life and let the past behind us. But they weren't there. They didn't feel the same pain as I do. They weren't haunted by nightmares.
     Still, all the stress was too much for them. My mother got sick and died because of all the diseases that kept coming and didn't want to heal. We hadn't the money for medicine, especially when my father lost his job because of his alcohol problem. He became an alcoholic.
     Back then I was yet too young to understand all that had happened; it was just too much. Why was my father many nights away from home or why did he hit me when he was angry and smelled like alcohol? I couldn't tell. How could a 9-year-old girl – who always did what her brother was doing – know that?

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