Heartbeat

I'm Sorry

"Pregnant? Taemin, what is she talking about?" Minho broke the silence. No one was able to utter a word after what Ji Yeon has to say.

"Mina, baby I can explain. Please just listen to me." finally Taemin found the strength to speak. He hold Mina's hands as if his life depends on them. His heart beating so fast, afraid of what might happen next. He wasn't prepared for this.

"Why do you need to explain? You can just tell me it's not true. It's impossible, right? You can't get her pregnant unless..unless..you.." she couldn't finish her sentence. She is smart, with just the look on Taemin's face, she knows. But she doesn't want to accept it. For once, she wanted to be dumb. 

"Taem, tell me it's not true. You'll never cheat on me, right baby?" she knows she sounded desperate holding on Teamin's shirt forcing him to deny everything. But his denial never came, his next words broke her into pieces.

"I'm sorry.." he couldn't look at her as he says those words with his trembling voice. He was so afraid when she lets go of his shirt. It's as if she's given up on him already.

"Yah! Taemin!" Jonghyun shouted from inside. No one expected this to happen. They know how much Taemin loves Mina. How can he do this to her?

"Oh God, how can you do this to me? I'm I not enough for you?" anger now visible in her voice. 

"That's not true!" Taemin tried to hold her again, tell her that she's all he need but she remove his hands.

"Don't touch me!" he couldn't believe the pain he felt when she refused his touch. She went inside the dorm, straight to Taemin's room. He followed her instantly, not minding his hyungs and Ji Yeon. Mina is all that matters to him.

"Baby please listen to me first." he pleaded once they are inside his room. Mina is now changing into her own clothes, leaving Taemin's clothes on the bed.

She didn't say a word, she's not even looking at him. When she finished changing her clothes, she pick up her bag and went outside, leaving Taemin inside the room. 

When she passed by the living room she saw everyone waiting for them, including Ji Yeon.

"Mina, I'll send you home." Jinki already has the key on his hand. She can only nod, her face void of any emotions. Looking at the woman claiming to be pregnant with her fiancé' child.

She look back at Taemin who is now walking out of his room. Their eyes met and Mina started walking towards him. Somehow, hope sprung inside Taemin's heart when Mina held his hands. But the tears he was holding back for a while now started pouring when she placed the ring he gave her on his palm.

"No..Mina please don't do this. I know you're angry right now. But please.." he is in a state of panic. He can't lose her. He just can't. He hugged her tight, no plans of letting her go. He don't care if he's begging in front of everyone.  

"I told you not to touch me, didn't I?" her voice is so cold he couldn't imagine it came from the warm woman he loves. 

"I can't lose you baby. I can't." he pleaded, still holding her in his arms.

"You should've thought of that before you cheated on me with that woman." she said pushing him with all her strength but he won't let go.

"Enough Taemin." it was Jinki who spoke holding on Teamin's shoulders.

"No hyung!" he still won't let go.

"Let her go! You hurt her! You expect her to be okay with it?! This is your fault, face the consequences! Grow up!" every word that Jinki said hit Taemin like bullets. He slowly let go of Mina. His head hanging so low, he sits on the floor not minding the eyes on him.

"I'm sorry.. I really am. God knows how much I love you. I don't know how to live without you. We already have our plans." he run his fingers on his hair and stopped on his nape. 

"Talk to her first." Mina finally said trying so hard to stay strong. The pain is too much for her to bear but she can't breakdown now. At least one of them needs to be sane.

Taemin just nodded. He didn't try to stop her when she started walking with Jinki towards the door. He needs to fix everything first before he can face her again. She's right, he needs to talk to Ji Yeon first.

                      *************************

Mina's POV

My legs gave up on me while walking towards Jinki's car. Luckily he was there to support me before I fall hard on the floor. He opened the car door for me and when I'm finally seated, I let go of all the emotions I've been holding back. I cried so hard until my chest hurts. And he just let me, I didn't hear a single word. And when finally I felt like I already run out of tears, he spoke.

"Do you feel better now?" he asked.

"No, I don't think I'll ever be okay."I choked on my words.

"You know how much he loves you, right?" he asked me.

"I know, that's why I never thought he could do this to me. I gave him my all. My heart, body and soul. I entrusted my future with him. Is it because I'm not enough? But I tried my best to be everything he'll ever need. Please tell me, where am I lacking?"I think I'm going crazy, a lot of things running inside my head.

"Don't say that Mina, we all know you're more than enough." he tried to pacify me with words.

"Then why? Why did he cheated on me? Is it all about sex? Am I not enough to satisfy his needs?" I don't care anymore if I'm actually telling him we did 'it' already. I want answers but I'm not yet ready to hear it from Taemin. I'm afraid.

"I'm not taking sides, but I know Taemin, he's not that kind of person. And you know it too. Hear him out first. But for now I'll take you to your house." he said while starting the engine.

"I don't want to go home, I'll only think of him there. Please take me to Ji Soo's house." I said closing my eyes.

I need my friend now more than ever.