Psycho

CHAPTER 18

  Guilt jabbed at Colton's heart like a dagger, drilling in deeper and deeper with every breath he sucked in. Guilt as a result of what he'd put the poor boy through the previous night and for the needy protrusion his pants at the sight of him in pain.

"Sir um, I can't..." His words caught in his throat as he sensed the incoming footsteps.

  His heart picked a tad as a pair of shoes suddenly but briefly came to settle before his downcast gaze. Then, the tray quickly vanished from his hold.

"Look up" Colton's voice shook a nick as S's shimmering eyes rose to meet the man's, a saddened glimmer clear as day.

  Colton had gone to place the tray by his bed before cautiously returning to the boy, his lower lip pinching between teeth and eyes mirroring uncertainty.

"Can you walk alright?" His voice grew shakier with concern after every word as regret fuelled his being.

"Yes sir, I just um.. can't stand for too long, it's sore back there" the noticable slack in his posture was all Colton needed to allow the daggers of guilt to slice deeper through his chest in swift motions.

  A lump settled in his throat as he racked his mind for a next action, contemplating with both remorse and doubt tugging harshly at his thoughts. Then finally, he drew a huge breath, deciding on a hopefully suitable approach.

"Come'ere" Colton's lips barely parted to mutter as his hands hesitantly scooped up the smaller boy, making him go wide eyed in shock.

"I said I was fine sir, you really don't have to do this" Colton paid no attention to his protests as he began to move, heading for the boy's room.

  The walk to the next room almost felt like an eternity to Colton. His feet felt heavy and his temples throbbed lightly as he took long trudges. His eyes kept forward as he tried his hardest not to return even a glance to the sparkling blues peering right at his slightly contorted face.

  Pacing into the dimly lit room, Colton was greeted with the musky and humid scent of sin. He gulped loudly, choosing to ignore the reek and gaiting directly for the mattress, going to gently place the boy upon it with a small grunt.

  Afterwards, his feet carried him towards the shut blinds, the  boy's eyes following him thoughtfully. He couldn't understand the man's behavior. This sort of affection should be spared considering the fact that he was sober the previous night.

   Colton proceeded to tug them open, allowing the blinding rays to delve in, settling upon every surface and finding every nook and cranny of the fairly fetid room.

  The beams reflected on Colton's face as the boy stared, mesmerized by the view. His deep grey orbs looked like something straight out of a storm, so pure and natural yet somewhat dangerous. His perfectly sculpted jawline, sharp and precisely crafted. Then the boy's eyes moved down to those cherry colored paper thin lips. They were so enticing the boy couldn't possibly imagine the pair gliding upon his skin, leaving wet traces of sweet alcohol scented desire. At this point, the boy didn't really mind having this man on top of him, oozing raw power and...

"You'll have to rest for now" Colton's dulcet voice pulled him back to reality.

  Colton now stood facing the boy, the light casting a shadow on his face. The man eyed the boy keenly, watching as he gulped nervously. Colton looked away.

"I'll bring you some ointment" the boy simply nodded even though the man had his eyes on the exit.

Colton took the silence as a sign of approval and for once, he was actually thank full for the silent reply.

  The awkwardness in the air seemed to weigh both men down to their knees in vulnerability. Heaviness was felt but it seemed that Colton had it worse, it was evident in his creased brows and cautious footing as he left the room.

  Once alone, the boy released a deep breath. Colton must have been fighting other battles, probably even ones that had nothing to do with the boy. S noticed it all, the exhaustion to his stance and furrow in his brow. But what about the puffy eyes, he'd been crying even before the boy made his presence and...

Was that a bulge I saw?

  The boy shifted in place as the unanswered questions flocked in his mind and just then, Colton returned. A small tubular object was clutched in his left hand and in his right, the tray of food he'd served him moments before.

"You'll have to eat something because I know you haven't" Colton came to take a seat right on the edge, placing the tray on the night stand before facing the boy again, a pained look on his face.

  The boy's eyes stretched downwards for a curt second, noticing the deflation on his crotch.

"Here" the boy flinched slightly as Colton outstretched the little tube towards him. S grabbed it from the man, a slight hesitance present.

  Colton proceeded to ascend to his feet, torment tugging at his mind as he watched the boy whimper in pain to a sitting position against the headboard.

  It was an unbareable sight for the man and he was the cause of it. He instinctively shut his eyes, shielding his gaze in hopes of ending the wavering guilt picking at his heart.

  He stood with closed eyes, patiently waiting out the ruffling sound of the boy adjusting positions.

"I'm sorry if I'm making you uncomfortable sir, I didn't mean for any of this to happen" Colton's heart stopped and hesitated in its race at the younger's statement.

  He opened his eyes again only to find the boy's lips in a pitiful pout and his eyes peering him his usual shy and helpless look. It was hard making eye contact at this point so he willingly let his gaze fall on a pillow just beside the boy.

"I'll give you some privacy" with that absent monotone, Colton took his silent leave.

S was left alone to wallow his own shame even more now at the man's actions. He was being so kind to him on something that wasn't even his fault. The boy sighed.

  He decided to push his thoughts aside, slowly reaching for the margins of his shirt and pulling it off over his head. Next, he tried his hardest to slip from his pants and underwear as painlessly as possible. It did not work.

  After a few face contortions and unhuman moans of pain, the boy was placed in a suitable position, his fingers slick and his arse in the air.

Here goes everything

......

  Colton couldn't help it, as much as he wanted to, he just couldn't. His hips rocked impudently into his fist, driving the painfully throbbing flesh blissfully through his warm palms.

  The screen played out the scene, the footage. What was happening right next to his own fucking room.

  The boy was in pain and here he was, shamelessly jerking off to his sufferings. His mind told him no but his body betrayed him. He would be lying to say that it didn't feel good. Even with the guilt, his body could still react.

Guilty pleasure never felt so fucking good