CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT

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THE WIND WAS BLOWING IN HER HAIR

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THE WIND WAS BLOWING IN HER HAIR. The soles of her running shoes were leaving footprints in the muddy grass. She kept her breathing controlled as she went further into the forest. It felt nice to be surrounded by nature and feel like she was back on track to start living her life again. Courtney's life had hit a stopping point, after everything that had gone down with Denny Duquette. The days had gone on, but it felt like her time had stopped. She had been buried alive, yelling for help, but nobody came. Eventually, she gave up and accepted the fact that it was over for her. However, then somebody came through and dug her up. Now, it was time for her to get out and welcome the light again.

Once she felt like her heart was going too fast, Courtney stopped running and placed her hand against a cold stone wall to support herself. She took deep breaths, while wiping away the sweat from her forehead. After not running weekly for nearly two months, her physical condition had taken a few steps back. It was harder to run as much as before without wanting to actually fall on the floor from fatigue. Looks like she was going to have to start from the beginning again. She then sat herself down with her back against the wall, while playing with a leaf next to her.

Courtney had gone back home a little more than two weeks ago and she still wasn't used to it. It felt odd to be surrounded by her roommates again. She wouldn't deny that she missed the relief of being on her own sometimes. No matter where she went, someone was always there or she could at least hear that someone else was in the house. There had been a couple of nights where she had wanted to go back to the hospital and sleep in one of the on-call rooms again. However, when she had that feeling, she grabbed the phone and called Paisley, who convinced her of the benefits of sleeping back home. She needed to separate at home Courtney from work Courtney or she would burn out eventually. Whenever Paisley didn't answer (which rarely happened), Courtney would steal Callie from George and they would have a little sleepover.

When that happened, Callie always wondered if she would finally get to hear what had been going on with Courtney for that one month, but her wish never came true. Courtney hadn't told anyone the reason why she had stayed away from home for so long and maybe she never would. Everyone knew that it had to have been something bad, but they didn't want to ask. They wanted her to come to them and tell them on her own time, even if it was never. Actually, it wasn't that hard to pinpoint the moment that she had fallen down, but nobody really wanted to think back to the whole Denny situation, so they never figured out that it was that which had knocked down Courtney. Everyone had all dealt with it in their own way. Some had pushed it deep down and pretended it hadn't happened, while for others it was the only thing on their mind.

Courtney sighed and threw away the leaf, before wrapping her arms around her legs and resting her head on her knees. She was slowly going back to her old self, but not as fast as she would've liked. She had thought that after moving back home that everything would be like it used to be, but it wasn't though. Her nightmares were still plaguing her, although less severe, just like the feeling of guilt. Talking with Izzie kept being a chore which she didn't want to do and George was still giving her the cold-shoulder. Sometimes she couldn't help but feel like she was walking on eggshells in the house. However, she tried to be strong and not run away again. She was going to face everything head-on.

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