The Chaotic Wires of Love **COMPLETE**

CHAPTER 12 - REALITY CHECK 1.2

Chapter 12 – Reality Check 1.2

The Same Night – 10 PM

Arnav's POV

I picked up the glass of the water next to me, and drank it quickly, and then I shifted my chair towards the face of my poolside, which was my personal space adjacent to my room,and I gazed at my reflection in the water, and for a second I was taken aback too, because of the pain and anguish that reflected back at me.

I tried to compose myself, but I couldn't, I just couldn't. I had just finished talking to Di, about earlier today, and I had felt that onslaught of pain return, and it didn't come alone, it came along with the eight years too late, realisation of Love.

Di pulled her chair next to me, and she held my hand as she spoke – " I know this is hard..."

I sighed as I looked at her, I had only felt this broken once before, and that was when Khushi had vanished from my life, and I knew my sister could read the pain in my being right now because I could spot the tears in her eyes and I took a deep breathe – " its not just hard di, that would be an understatement to what iv been feeling, this hollow feeling in the middle of chest wont just go away di, and to be honest I have only felt so broken once before, and that was when I had realised that Khushi had vanished from my life, and I had made the choice to suppress it all, because I didn't know how to deal with this pain, and then for all these years I had always felt this need to stay connected to her memories, no matter how distant she was, hell, I didn't even know where she was, maybe my heart didn't want to forget someone who gave it so much to remember, and now that I have realised that it was always love, I don't know how to stop the onslaught of emotions that come with that realisation,and it feels like im just helplessly drowning into a whirlpool of love, emotion, angst and heartbreaking pain, all at once, and I have no idea how am I going to cope up with this..."

Di took a deep breathe as she pressed my hand – " it will be ok, give yourself time, let your emotions work with your mind this time around,and it will all start to get better.."

I sighed – " I don't know about that di,but all I know is that I cannot undo the realisation of love,I cannot undo the emotion, the pain, the memories, and probably I'm just destined to be stuck this way..im sure my fate , is having a good laugh at my helplessness right now..."

Di pulled me into a side hug – " no chotte, it isn't like that alright, don't be so harsh on yourself,I will not justify your mistakes because I know you committed a blunder but then , now, with the reality in your face, you are going to have to stop beating yourself within about it, you have got to let that guilt go..."

I looked into her eyes – " really how?? How should I do that di, because all I feel is anger at myself , had I not been stupid in the past, it would have been different..."

Di – " well you can choose to think about the what if's but they will drive you crazy, you cannot change the past, the only option you have here is to face the present..."

I sighed.My sister was always right.

"I love her di, I loved her back then too,and you were right when you said that a part of me is very strongly in love with Khushi and her memories, even though she wasn't a part of my life for the last eight years, and you know what I relaised di, it's the hardest to let go of something that you never really had, because a part of you yearns for it in such a strong way , that you just cant let go...gosh di...I feel like I want to cry..."

My sister pulled me in for a warm hug ,and I just seeked comfort in her affection, as I wiped a tear out of my eye , I wanted to cry , but then I wouldnt cry in front of her, it would kill her to see me this way, and I only had myself to blame for my stupidity that landed me in this mess in the first place ,and she pulled back many minutes later and she picked up Khushi's business card from the table on the side and she looked at it and she asked – " what now...??"