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NINETEEN SEVENTY-NINE
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Abhaya
Day 1
It's been three days since I caught Michael fucking another woman. Fucking Lily.I was so close to doing something along the lines of committing such heinous crimes as arson and murder.
The murder part only depended on them getting out of the house in time but from how lost they seemed to be in the land of pleasure, I'm sure they wouldn't have made it out. I guess the man above spared them.
I guess he spared me when he decided to make the clouds grey, and the sky shed tears that cast the fiery matches in my hands away.
When the rain plummeted from the sky, my senses returned to me, and I couldn't believe what I had almost done. It's true what they say about love making you do such crazy things. Love has made me do crazy shit, like give up my dreams of becoming a fashion icon. The first black fashion powerhouse was my dream, but I gave it all up for Michael. I gave up London and Saint Augustine for Michael.
I gave up Ricky for Michael.
I gave so much for Michael just for him to break me into such small pieces that there was no way I could be mended. My heart was broken, but more importantly, my spirit was broken. That's worse than having a broken heart. I had been in my room for three days straight, trying to understand why my life was spiraling out of control. I felt like I was going crazy, and I was. I didn't know what to do with myself.
Four days.
Four days was all I had before I would be shipped off to college. I didn't want that anymore. I didn't want to go to Spelman. I didn't want to go to Atlanta, but I didn't want to be with him, most importantly.
