Rusger Oneshots

Harem Shenanigans 1.

Warning: Bad language ahead. Don't like don't read pls don't report me or somthing-

Welcome to this new...thing!! Idk what to call it, maybe a series lmao XD 

I mean they will be called the Harem Shenanigans lmao

Imma just add numbers after them to label ahahaha

As said before, this will be mini shots of the well-loved German Harem, until I can get back to full-scale story plots after my exams, in June!!

So I hope y'all will enjoy dis, even though this first one I didn't put much thinking into it XDXD You'll see why when you read later on-

No Originality AT ALL. My last brain cells sends their regards-

Anyways, enjoy!! I wrote this in like two hours im sorry if it's rubbish-

(Read to the end end for special smthing kay just a smol sneak peek X3)

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Germany walked cheerfully down the corridor, humming a German song softly under his breath as he walked to the cafeteria for lunch. He was pretty hungry, after working all day. Hopefully Russia could handle lunch himself at home, and not burn down the house. Again.

Just kidding not the whole house. But the kitchen though. 

Suddenly Germany heard loud footsteps behind him, and turned around to see who it was. His eyes widen, then relaxed again as he pleasantly at the other country. 

"Guten tag Amerika! How's NATO doing today?" He said, making conversation, arms swinging naturally beside his body. America looked at him through his black shades, and sped up to walked beside him. He looked tense, nervous, and Germany raised an eyebrow.

"Hey Ger. I'm fine. Everything's going great..." The larger country said, his voice strained and worried. He suddenly grabbed Germany's smaller shoulders, and pulled him to the side of the hallway. 

"Look. I'm sorry for what I'm about to do-" America said, standing in front of Germany with a serious expression on his face, his jaw set.

"Wha-"

Germany yelped loudly in pain as America punched him right in the gut, his knuckles felt like it would burst right through his body like a knife. He folded into himself, clutching his stomach in agony.

"Scheiße(1)!! What the Fuck, America?!" Germany screamed, nearly kneeling over in pain. America was mumbling apologies under his breath, to who he didn't know, and didn't care, he punched him for heaven's sake.

"Ger, you are one of my very best friends, and I cannot stand by and watch you throw away your life like this. You're too young. You're too beautiful." America said, grabbing Germany's shoulders again and making him look him in the eye, or through his sunglasses anyway. 

Germany stared at him, his eyes confused and pained. He sounded so serious, yet ever so dramatic at the same time. He panted harshly, sucking in breaths of air as the pain in his abdomen slowly subsided.

"What...what the Fuck are you talking about?" He hissed, his German accent making the english words muddle together, until his cursing didn't even sound much like English anymore. It was kinda hot, America thought-

"I'm talking about the baby that growing inside your belly right now." He said, with all seriousness he could muster, pointing at the area of Germany where he just punched. Germany could see something held inside his fist. It looked like a white stick, and he could see two pink lines at its face.

Germany stared at him, his brain as blank as as white piece of paper. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, a range of emotions like confusion, anger, and more confusion in his eyes.

"I'm not pregnant!" Germany finally blurted out, pushing America's hand off his shoulders. America snapped out of his own trance, and grinned brightly. Germany was just confusion at this point. Right now all he could think of was how hungry he was. And how much more of lunch break he had left-

"Well, not after that punch you're not. I've been taking muay thai classes." America beamed, puffing out his chest proudly. Germany breathed in deeply, closing his eyes and crossing his arms over his body. "I was never pregnant, America." He said sternly, willing his eyes to be cold fire.

America blinked, pursing his lips as the gears in his brain turned slowly. "Are...are you sure?" He said, taking a small step back as Germany glared at him. He swallowed, thinking about how hard he had actually punched him.

"Amerika, I'm a male. I CAN'T get pregnant even if I wanted to. Yes I'm fucking sure!!" He shouted, not loud enough to tell everyone in the building, but just enough to be forceful. America whistled slowly, his eyes darting away awkwardly and he cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry, but why the helvetti(2) is everyone yelling over here?" A voice spoke up from behind them, making them both look up. Germany breathed a sigh of relief as America turned away, and stopped cornering him into the wall, he was literally pinned there for 5 minutes already. Finland, with his crossed arms and one eyebrow raised, stared at them, mostly at America.

"Oh, I found this positive pregnancy test in the toilet after Germany and-" The bigger country said. Finland's eyes widen for a split second before going back to his calm glance. He pushed America away, making him protest and growl under his breath, and stood in front of Germany. 

"Saksa, I'm sorry from what I'm about to do-" 

Germany doubled over in pain again, his mouth open in a silent yell. Finland pulled back his fist, sighing in sadness. 

"OW motherfucker!!" 

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*Russia, back at their house, making pop tarts in the microwave for lunch*

Russia: Somethings wrong I can sense it- 

(There's a fork in his tart(Dont ask) and tiny lightning bolts are being created in the microwave send help-)

Insert the house fire 2.0 

I'm sorry for making Germany boi curse so much ahahaha-

Translations :3

(1) Fuck

(2) Hell

OKay, One more Important, Special thing. If you have read my conversations, you will know...

That I've made a New AU!! Yayyy!!! I'm excited about it I hope you will be too-

And I've decided to do a First Three Paragraph Sneak Peek for you guys cuz I appreciate everyone of you and don't want to disappoint. >:3

I will not say what the AU actually is, but you can try n guess-

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Russia swept his snow white bangs away from his forehead, then adjusted his crown to hold them in place, taking two steps back to see his royal appearance in the mirror.

He groaned in frustration, and ripped away the small golden crown, letting his hair fall back down. Today was the day, after 18 years of waiting, somehow, he didn't feel excited at all. Rather, he felt dread and actually, a bit of annoyance. When he was much younger, he longed for this day to come, and here he was. Not excited at all.

"My prince, it is time for the ceremony." A female voice called to him, and he looked through the mirror to see a middle aged servant standing politely with her hands folded in front of herself, looking at him expectantly. Her plain, Beta scent tickled his nose, and he sniffed lightly. Not so gently, he plunked down the crown on his head, letting his bangs hang partly over his ice blue eyes, and followed her.

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Ehehehehehe UWU yeah I have started writing as well. I really like it-

Okay I'm done for now. I hope you liked this!! Thank you for reading again!! even though Its crap XD

Bye-