Dysphoria [q.k + trans!male!reader!]

013

Not in y/n's POV

"Kun? What's wrong why are you crying?" Ten asks as he knocks on the door of the sobbing boy.

"Go away!" He screamed, his voice broken and cracked. The rest of the WayV boys looked at each other sadly, their minds working together to think of an idea.

"Maybe only one of us should talk to him?" Hendery suggested, the others nodding hesitantly.

"Kun? Can you at least let one of us talk to you?" Winwin shouts to their leader.

A sad noise is admitted from the boy's mouth before he spoke up. "C-can Lucas, and Y-Yangyang some in?" He stutters due to crying.

The said boys look at each other confused, not sure why he wanted them. "Okay, we're coming in."

The door opens up slowly, the two boys walking in to find their leader curled up on the bed as tears flowed like rivers down his face. They were crushed at the sight, neither of them have ever seen the older like this in their time of knowing him.

"G-guys I m-messed up so f-fucking bad." Kun mumbles, his body shaking as he tried stopping the tears.

"Is this about y/n?" Yangyang asks softly, only to regret it after thinking he messed up.

"Y-yeah..." the two sigh at the answer, knowing there was something going on between the two.

"Kun... why do you avoid him? Did he do something wrong?" Lucas asked, trying to keep his voice soft to not trigger Kun into another sobbing fit.

"No! That's the point! I want something to be wrong so it doesn't seem like he's the most perfect human being!" Kun snaps, getting out of his bed in a swift movement.

"You shouldn't judge a book by its cover, Kun, y/n has been through way more than you think he has." Lucas replies, causing Kun's face to drop with sadness.

"If you think he's so great, then why do you treat him like this?!" Yangyang snaps back, defending y/n.

"I'm sorry... I'm just scared..." Kun sits back on the end of his bed, his face straight, but still full of sadness.

"Scared of what?! Scared he's going to be better than you?! Scared he's going to kick you farther out of the spotlight than you already are?! If that's even possible!!" Yangyang lashes out, Lucas' mouth widening at the last bit.

"Woah, Yang! That's taking it too far! You know Kun is just as worthy as the rest of us and the fans love him just as much! I know your fucking mad right now but that doesn't mean you can lower his freaking self esteem!" Lucas yells, pushing Yangyang to the door.

"Now leave before you ruin the last chance you have of keeping your friendship with Kun alive." Lucas opens the door, nudging the younger out.

When Lucas turns back around, he is met with a once again sobbing Kun. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I'm sorry..."

"Kun! Snap out of it! You know he didn't really mean it, he's just upset with you since you hurt y/n... now I'm not sure if you really wanna talk about it, but I just want you to know that y/n is really upset, he likes you a lot and wants to be friends but you won't let that happen." Lucas rubs the older's back, trying to sooth the sad male.

"L-Lucas?" Kun stutters, receiving a hum from the younger. "I w-want you to know that I a-asked for y-you, and Y-Yangyang because you t-two are the c-closest with him... and I think there's something wrong with me..." Lucas looks at the older male confused.

"What do you mean there's something wrong with you?" He asks softly, Kun talking a deep breath as if to prepare himself for his answer.

"W-When I first saw y/n, my heart basically stopped... I thought he was the most beautiful boy alive and so I panicked. I made the stupid choice to ignore him because I though if I didn't I would mess something up and he would think I'm weird and hate me... but now I've realized that he hates me anyways, because I was so mean to him... he wanted all of us there and I didn't come in fear of making a fool of myself..." Kun had his head low in embarrassment, the stuttering stopping a bit.

"Lucas? Why does my heart want him so badly... but my brain chooses to hide from him?"

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